We have already seen in another article that we are often limited by fear of the judgment of others, since we fear what people may think or say about us. For example, some experience a strong lack of self-confidence when comparing themselves to friends. This kind of fear it is very limiting to one's personal growth, and it is exclusively negative (unlike the fear related to the perception of danger which, instead, protects us). It is, in fact, a useless, futile and, often, even imaginary fear!
Considers that whenever you really stop to look fear in the face you gain strength, courage and self-confidence. In those moments it is as if you are able to say to yourself: “I survived the horror. I can happily accept the next thing that happens. " In short, you can only overcome a fear if you do the very thing you think you cannot do.
In other words, you can overcome fear only through action, facing it head-on and saying to yourself, "I can and will do what I fear."
It is normal for fear to exist in every man, the important thing is that it is accompanied by courage. We must not let ourselves be overwhelmed by fear, otherwise it becomes an obstacle that prevents us from moving forward.
Paolo Borsellino
I don't know if it can console you, but there are even great lecturers who, despite their long experience and hundreds of speeches, admit that they still get scared every time they take the stage; they still feel tense and a little scared. And they also agree on something else: feeling a little nervous before a conference raises the adrenaline, makes you more alert and encourages you to try even more energetically to communicate the message.
Then do the unpleasant task now and you will reduce the worry! We all have tasks that we would simply like to see disappear. There are many "phobias" in life. Some examples are the fear of making a phone call to a new customer, the fear of asking for a favor, the fear of soliciting, the fear of asking for a loan when our eligibility to receive a credit is uncertain, the fear of applying for a credit. work when we are unlikely to get it, fear of talking about a problem with a spouse, or fear of making a phone call to discuss a sensitive matter with an angry customer or an angry relative.
Here's an important thing you need to know: the more you postpone performing an unpleasant task, the more unpleasant it becomes. The more you postpone requesting a certain thing related to your job (a salary increase, a transfer, a change in working hours), the more you will come up with reasons not to ask for it. The postponement magnifies the fear; action eliminates it!
When you postpone something you don't feel like doing right now, but you know it would still be appropriate to deal with it, all you do is spend even more time worrying, also running the risk of problems worsening or multiplying. Failure to act immediately could harm you greatly, as postponement reinforces fear. Action, on the other hand, eliminates it!
Courage grows when we act, fear grows when we postpone it.
Publilius Syrus
Do the thing you fear and the fear will disappear. Believe me, it is a straightforward and very effective method.
Are you afraid to discuss a problem with your boss? Discuss!
Does it make you nervous to apply for a job? Apply!
Are you afraid of asking someone for a date? Ask for it!
A friend who skydives, who I asked to tell me how he found the courage to face the first jump, replied: “I did two things: first, I received all the instructions on the ground on how to do it; and second, I jumped. "
Procrastination only erodes your self-confidence just as a flood erodes the surrounding terrain.
In the workplace, for example, no one wants to work for a superior who tends to put off. And no employee will want to work for you if you can't make up your own mind.
The more you put off an unpleasant matter, the more you worry and the more pain you will feel. Eliminate birth problems: face them with courage and defeat them right away!
