The past few months have seen many people spending far more time alone than we ever thought. With quarantines and the social distancing of the "new normal", there is more time to be alone. Which leads to the question: Are there any benefits in loneliness?
We live in a world of constant contact, a place that is losing sight the importance of being alone. Offices are moving away from cubicles in favor of shared desks and open common spaces, and instead of sitting at desks working independently, school-age children are put to study in groups. With the inevitable confusion: the omnipresent background noise, which informs us instantly of every text message, tweet and notification. Even something as mundane as cooking a dinner has become worth sharing.
One result of all this social bonding is that under normal circumstances many of us rarely have any time to spend in blissful solitude. Even if we are told that this social life is good and right, and that being around other people is necessary for a fulfilling life, the sense of oppression sometimes becomes strong.
Jean de la Bruyère said: “All the misfortunes of men arise from hatred of loneliness”.
A study of 600 computer programmers in 92 companies found that while productivity levels were relatively stable within each company, they varied greatly from company to company. The most productive companies had one thing in common: they left the open office (open space, etc.) in favor of sprivate work patients which guaranteed freedom from interruptions. 62% of top performers said they have adequate privacy in the workplace, while only 19% of the worst performers shared this opinion. And, among the worst, 76% said of have often been unnecessarily interrupted.
Loneliness in small doses is not only a professional benefit, it is also good for your mental and emotional well-being. To get the most out of life, you must learn to enjoy the time spent alone. The benefits of loneliness are too numerous to list, but here are some of the best.
Reclaim your self
We all need time to recover and recharge our energies. There is nothing like spending time alone to make this happen. The peace and quiet that you feel when you are alone they are essential for recovering from the stresses of everyday life. You read that right.
You can do what you want. As fun as it is to spend time with other people, sometimes we have to compromise. You constantly change your ideas to suit the wishes and opinions of others. Being alone frees you to do exactly what you want when you want. You can wear what you want, eat what you want to eat and work on projects that are meaningful to you.
You learn to trust yourself
Freedom is more than just doing what you want; it is the ability to trust one's instincts and to think clearly, without any external pressure or influence. Being alone helps you form one clear understanding of who you are, what you know and what is right for you. It teaches you to trust yourself. When you are close to others, even when you don't realize it, you monitor people's reactions to assess the appropriateness of your feelings and actions. When you are alone, it is all in your hands.
You develop your ideas and opinions, without making them watered down by what others think. Once you learn to enjoy solitude, you discover what you are truly capable of, without the constraints of other people's thinking.
Increase emotional intelligence
Emotional intelligence is the ability to recognize and understand emotions in yourself and others and your ability to use this awareness to manage your behavior and relationships. Self-awareness is the foundation of emotional intelligence, and you cannot increase it without becoming aware of it. Since self-awareness requires understanding your emotions and how you react to various people and situations, this requires careful self-reflection, and self-reflection is best done when alone.
Increase self-esteem
Enjoying your company is a huge boost to self-confidence. If you are bored and restless when you are alone, it is easy to start thinking that you are boring or that you need other people around to have fun. Learning to enjoy alone time boosts your self-esteem, confirming that you are a lot of stuff (damn impostor syndrome).
You value others more
Absence really makes the heart grow. Time alone allows you to see people in a whole new light and helps you develop a renewed sense of gratitude for who they are and for what they do.
Get more
It is said that "more hands make the light work," and while that might be true when it comes to raking leaves, it's a completely different story with cognitive tasks. The effectiveness of brainstorming is also more myth than reality. Texas A&M University researchers found that group brainstorming hinders productivity due to "cognitive fixation".
Cognitive fixation is the tendency of people working in groups to get stuck on the ideas of others, reducing their ability to find something new, and the larger the group, the more fixated everyone becomes. Spending time alone not only eliminates distractions, but also ensures that you don't have a problem with too many people who sometimes block you.
Everyone benefits from loneliness. Take this week's opportunity to enjoy some of your alone time.
What do you do when you spend time alone? Please share your thoughts in the comments, because I learn from you as much as you learn from me.
