Why are you obsessed with the past and 4 ways to leave it? 🆙

Are you obsessed with the past and don't understand why? Do you have traumas that you cannot overcome and would like some advice? You are in the right place.

“Crying over a bad past is the surest way to attract new evils. When luck takes away what cannot be preserved, you have to be patient: it turns your offense into a joke.

William Shakespeare

You are not satisfied with your present

I have heard of many people who are stuck in their past and have a lot of regrets about the things they have done or not done.

Suppose someone broke up with you and left you in low spirits. In this case, it is very likely that from time to time you rethink this bad event. Now suppose you have found someone else which is much better of this person who left you (according to your standards). Do you think you would still be sick compared to the past?

Probably your negative emotions will be greatly attenuated, since your present will prevent you from rethinking the past

Because we have recurring negative thoughts about the past.

our unconscious mind will always remind us of negative events of our life until we find a suitable solution.

Let's say your group of friends decides to exclude you from the group without giving you any explanation. In this case, it is very likely that you are still obsessed with this event simply because your mind needs a resolution of the problemwhich at least one explanation. Past events may continue to haunt you until something convinces your mind to settle down. Now one of the people in the group told you the truth and you found out that these people were jealous of you because you are more popular than them.

How do you feel about the event now?

In this case, the memory of the event will bother you much less since you have provided an explanation to your subconscious mind.

How can you stop being obsessed with the past?

Now that you know how things work, it's time for you to learn to stop obsessing over the past:

Fix the present: The first thing you need to do to stop obsessing over the past is to make sure that your present is going well. Our mind makes us rethink the negative things of the past when our present is not happy.
Reach a resolution: To stop dwelling on the past, you need to give your mind a good explanation of what happened. Once your mind has found a convincing explanation, the negative emotions you feel will greatly diminish.
I promise to fix what happened: past experiences can leave us damaged in some way. In this case, it is best to promise yourself that you will eliminate this damage by making serious changes in your life. Once your mind believes in your plan, your negative emotions will subside.
Neutralize Emotional Damage: we remember negative events due to their strong emotional component. Suppose you were rejected and this event damaged your self-confidence. in this case you will care about the rejection just because it has damaged your self-esteem. the moment you can rebuild it, this past event will probably stop afflicting you.

“I live neither in my past nor in my future. I only have the present, and it is the present that interests me. If you can stay in the present all the time, you will be a happy man. Life will be a party, a great banquet, because it is always and only the moment that we are living”.

Paulo Coelho

Conclusions

If you feel that you are somehow haunted by the past, now you have something guide linesto improve your situation

I am 110% sure that any event that has bothered you, you are fully capable of facing it and overcoming it. I trust you!

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Bonus – EDMR (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing) Therapy

EMDR therapy is a technique used to treat ailments caused by stressful or traumatic events such as post-traumatic stress disorder. It uses alternate eye movements to restore the excitatory/inhibitory balance, allowing better communication between the cerebral hemispheres.

Leave the past in the past. Self-help techniques in EMDR
Book with an exhaustive and very clear language, it perfectly introduces and explains the theory of the EMDR technique and the technique itself.

Although the effectiveness of the system can only be discovered by submitting to this methodology, (recommended to those who recognize that they have unresolved psychological situations or traumas), those interested in the subject can use this book to get closer to these details. techniques!