The only constant in life is the change. There are cumulative changes that we hardly realize, and there are changes that come like a hurricane and turn our lives upside down. In any case, it is better not to resist and learn to adapt to new circumstances, maximizing the advantages they can offer us. Very often radical changes come from unexpected events that cause real existential crises, inflection points on our path. These changes are painful and difficult to accept, especially because they take us by surprise. But we can prepare to face them by generating small changes within ourselves that will transform us into more resilient people. We can change, create opportunities ourselves and prepare to live. To achieve this, you can make your own some habits that will probably change your way of seeing the world and the way you relate to the “I” forever.Small changes that little by little take us far
1. Make sense of your life. Some people go through their entire lives without realizing that they have lived. Still others live life with such joy and enthusiasm that they become contagious. When we finally answer questions like: what do I want to do with my life? What really stimulates me? What makes me really happy? we can give purpose and direction to our life. This does not mean that you will not get lost anyway in small and narrow alleys that lead nowhere, but that you can always quickly recover the main road because you will no longer be wandering aimlessly, waiting for others to determine your direction.2. Write down your dreams. When we were children we had many dreams, which mostly got lost along the way, as if they were too heavy stones. But living without dreams is like dying a little every day. Therefore, one of the oldest techniques of Buddhism is to write our wishes, even if they seem impossible. And the more the better. In fact, most people only manage to list between five and seven wishes, but the really interesting aspect of this technique comes when you go further, because it forces you to look inside yourself and ask yourself exactly what you want, not what you think you are. want.
3. Propose goals. Setting goals is an art that is not difficult to learn, but often the unconscious plays against us. In fact, there's nothing worse than continually planning the same goals, as people who always want to lose weight do, and can't. The sense of frustration is so great that it becomes a burden on your self-esteem. Therefore, goals must be specific, measurable, no matter if they are short or long term. When the goals are too uncertain it is generally because they hide a resistance at the bottom, it is because something inside you is leading you in the opposite direction and does not want you to achieve them. Discovering this dynamic changes your life completely, because it transforms you into a proactive person, the architect of your destiny.
4. Get rid of remorse. Remorse is like heavy stones that weigh down the backpack of life. They don't allow you to move forward because they continually make you look back and take your strength away, when what you need is to look to the future. Learning to accept the consequences of our actions and decisions, without remorse, is extremely liberating, because it offers us a security that we did not know, a security that gives us greater freedom and courage to undertake new paths. A good exercise to get rid of guilt is to write the remorse on a balloon and let it go with the wind. And as you see them move away, you will feel freer.
5. Face your fears. As we grow up, the list of things that scare us increases. The monsters cease to frighten us Little changes that little by little take us far away that we had under the bed and in the wardrobe, but take their place of even worse monsters, which paralyze us, like the fear of failure. Therefore, a great exercise is to choose some of the things that scare us and have the courage to put them into practice. Facing our fears and realizing that most are unfounded gives us incredible strength that we have never experienced before. At that point you realize that the true limits are only in your mind, not in the world.
6. Love yourself unconditionally. Probably the most difficult exercise of all is to love ourselves as we are, to accept that we make mistakes, that we are not perfect and that, probably, sometimes we also manifest a wrong attitude towards the people we love most. But rather than feel guilty, we have chosen to love each other. Love us, which is not the same as accepting us. Indeed, love is a very deep feeling that exists regardless of errors and reason. It is about becoming our best ally when we are wrong and not to complain harshly, but to be courageous, an attitude radically different from what we have been taught, in a society where only success is rewarded and error cruelly punished.
7. Live in the moment. We often focus so hard on being happy that we miss the opportunity to be happy. In fact, I recently read a quote that stuck with me: “since I stopped looking for myself, I feel better”. Even if we have goals and we know where we are going, it is just as essential to learn to enjoy the "here and now", without pretensions or expectations as to live intensely what is happening to us. When you learn to live in the present moment, something changes forever in you, because you are trying to squeeze the juice of life, and you realize that to be able to do so it is enough to be fully present, enjoying all those things that you did not see before, because your own speed confused you. Remember that every day is a decision. It is up to you to choose one or the other direction.
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