There are times when everything seems difficult to us. We don't have enough patience and anything demoralizes us. Why do we feel this way?
Written and verified by the psychologist GetPersonalGrowth.
Last update: February 18, 2022
Why do I feel I have less and less patience with each passing day? The world seems to advance with the slowness of a sloth and a calm that makes me despair.
I don't expect anything, I rarely reach the goals I set myself and what is worse, I feel trapped in a vortex where everything revolves around negativity and frustrated expectations.
Do you know this feeling? You are not alone. There are many people who experience this psychological reality, who complain of pain in the jaw when they try to suppress tension, who feel a vacuum in the stomach and who feel more nervous and thoughtful than usual.
All human errors, Kafka said, are the fruit of impatience. However, sometimes this reality is motivated by triggers that are as complex as they are particular.
Sometimes you feel that you are patient and relaxed, but suddenly, due to certain circumstances, that calm runs out. That's when that resistance, hope and even optimism vanish to give way to malaise. Why does this happen? How can this situation be explained?
Reasons why we have less patience every day
Defining impatience is quite easy: it is a state that travishes those who are unable to face events without getting nervous and those who lack the ability to perform a task without losing their temper.
Some more some less we know how it feels in these cases and what happens when this dimension takes over. What we don't know is why it shows up.
Why do we get impatient? Why are there times when it is more difficult to tolerate waiting, accept the way others do and resign ourselves to the fact that things don't always go the way we want?
It is true that there are also people who are impatient by nature, that is, who always show this behavioral pattern. However, sometimes we find ourselves totally overwhelmed by this dimension. Let's see why.
Stress and the overactive amygdala
There are times when external demands far outweigh the psychological resources at our disposal. Work or lack of it, family, the weight of uncertainties, frustrated goals, etc., put us in a state of great stress.
Under these circumstances, the amygdala, an area of ​​the brain linked to emotional processing, begins to be more overactive than normal.
This translates into a constant sense of threat that makes us analyze every event, circumstance and stimulus with mistrust and fear. All this causes our mental concentration is tinged with anguish and impatience and makes us hurry.
Depression and lower serotonin levels
Why do I have less and less patience every day? What makes me feel the most irritable? Why am I sometimes unable to finish or even start a task?
After this psychological state, depression can often appear. Research published in the journal Current Biology has presented interesting data in this regard.
Dr Zachary Mainen and his team at the Champalimaud Center of the University of Lisbon (Portugal) found a relationship between low activation of serotonin neurons and a lack of patience. These nerve cells and their neurotransmitter are linked to well-being, motivation, achievement and happiness.
Low levels of this neurochemical are associated with depressive disorders. If we perceive that we are less and less patient, that apathy devours us and sleep or eating disorders appear, it is advisable to consult a professional.
Why do I have less and less patience every day? The frustrated hopes
Today we must be more patient than ever, because achieving a goal requires a lot more perseverance. The realization of our projects takes longer than a few years ago. Even emotional relationships and social life in general are more demanding.
Such a landscape often fills us with bitter frustrations. So, when we are faced with more than one failure, more than a lost goal along the way or a vanished dream, it is normal to wonder inside "why do I have less and less patience every day?" The accumulation of frustrated experiences ends up affecting our calm, tolerance, in general that internal balance that makes us able to breathe a sigh and reflect.
Reversing the process, that is, passing from impatience to patience, is not easy, but neither is it impossible. Because the good news is that the art of patience can be learned and improved. First we need to understand that we cannot speed up time so that things move faster.
Nor is it possible to manipulate reality, events or people so that everything goes as we want. We can't be in control of everything. The world is fallacious, as are those around us and as we are ourselves.
Learning to be more patient means harboring the hope that while things sometimes don't turn out the way we want or expect, that doesn't mean they always will.
Patience is not always a virtue, sometimes it is an approach that we are forced to choose, nurture and promote.
