Very often in order not to show ourselves weak and to please others, we try to show ourselves strong when in reality we just need to be alone. Carving out personal spaces should never make us feel guilty.
Last update: Augusts 16, 2021
How nice it would be to be able to stop smiling when we don't feel like it; tell the world that today we don't want to go out and that we don't want the company of other people, that we choose to be alone or rather that we just prefer our company. It would be great to be able to communicate without feeling that lump in my throat and that strange feeling in my stomach. In short, don't feel guilty.
If only the others accepted what we want at all times and come back to us when we show signs of openness again… Without problems and without reproaches. Sometimes we deserve to curl up on ourselves to be alone, recharge our batteries and start over stronger than before
Sometimes bad days are also necessary, especially to learn to value the ones that are best. The magic of contrast can teach us a lot if we pay attention to it.
Because it is not enough to know that roses have thorns and that they must be removed: it is also necessary to learn where they are and how to act so as not to harm us.
We might be wrong, but that reluctance to do things and see people takes hold of us and we think we're not doing anything to occupy our time. But it is important to learn that calm usually comes after the storm. The point is that this doesn't always happen in the conditions we would like.
Don't feel guilty for feeling uncomfortable
Feeling bad is more common than we imagine. Not everything in life is perfect. The problem is that society no longer allows us to be weak and uncomfortable. Effectively, showing oneself this way somehow implies feeling guilty about the judgments and the opinions of the people around us.
If we are sad and not afraid to say it, the people around us will make us feel "different". Some will see us as invalids, others will despise us while in still others we will awaken feelings of compassion that will make them rush to our aid to encourage us to go out.
It seems that tolerating the discomfort of others is not so easy, nor so comfortable that it is better to hide, isolate ourselves or even ignore what we feel.
Perhaps the discomfort of others reminds us that we also feel the same. But in a society that somehow punishes the expression of weakness, it is not so easy to accept it.
Yet, there is nothing more wrong than hiding the discomfort and feeling guilty about it. It is the law of life. Bad days exist and nothing happens if they are frequent. They don't hurt as bad as they look. Their presence indicates that there is something we need, so it is very important to listen to our heart.
Forcing ourselves to act differently from what our inner self requires of us, forcing our external image and putting a smile on our face when it does not arise from within us, is even more difficult.
So allowing our discomfort to come out and express itself will help alleviate it. If we accept that this has to happen, feeling guilty won't be that easy.
The best refuge is ourselves
For bad days the best shelter is what we can provide ourselves. That space of solitude but at the same time of company, where we can let off steam without feeling guilty and help ourselves. Because somehow we are there for us.
A place where we are allowed to show ourselves sad and tired and try to understand what is happening to us. A place to fix what's broken. An off-limits area in which to post the closing sign for holidays, work in progress or early closure.
emotions
We are our inner refuge, the support that lifts us up and the embrace that envelops us. The ideal space to let the discomfort flow with the sole intention of feeling and understanding it. Why also taking time for oneself is necessary and for this we should never feel guilty.
The world will continue to turn, but in the meantime we will have learned to get back on the carousel as soon as we have enough strength to do it again, without pressure, without pretensions and above all without feeling guilty.
