We all want to be loved and accepted, but sometimes we take the wrong path to achieve this. Perhaps people do not take us into consideration because we have not been able to give due weight to their opinion. Here is an original way to deal with such a situation.
Last update: October 09, 2021
Sometimes it is good to stop and ask yourself why others ignore our ideas, our feelings and even our presence. It is common to feel ignored and invisible while always being attentive to the needs of others (or at least that's our feeling).
If this is repeated, a dynamic could arise in which feeling ignored becomes the norm. We accept this situation because we think we are not up to the others or because we don't like to appear or make others uncomfortable.
In reality, it doesn't have to be. All human beings deserve respect and recognition. What we think, feel and desire has the same value as what others think, feel and desire. If you are interested in knowing why you are not being considered, consider the following points.
7 reasons why it is common to feel ignored
1. Make unnecessary sacrifices
It is not true that we must think of others before ourselves, at least if you want to be in good mental health. Thinking about yourself first is not selfishness, but sound logic. To sacrifice unnecessarily for others carries an implicit message: others are more important than us.
Why is it said on airplanes that in the event of a depressurization, adults have to put on the oxygen mask first and only then put it on to children or people who need assistance? Think about it.
2. Depend on the approval of others
There is a whole series of implicit and unconscious mechanisms through which a person conveys the idea that he vividly needs the approval of others.
Generally, the addiction to approval generates a feeling of rejection in others, as it conveys a negative message about oneself.
If we don't trust ourselves, why should others trust us? If we feel inferior and insecure, others will probably do too.
3. Look for defects only in oneself
Without noticing it, we may feel responsible for everything that happens around us. When something bad happens, we immediately feel guilty, without knowing why. The bad news is that others will end up thinking the same.
On many occasions, no one will thank you for taking on tasks that are not yours. In reverse, you will become a scapegoat on many occasions. Better never think about who is "at fault"; rather, focus on getting things right.
4. Feeling ignored due to complacency
Having little consideration can lead to praise yourself frequently, or to talk about your strengths or successes or everything you do for others.
This is just another way of showing how dependent you are on outside opinion. The only person you need to convince is yourself.
What really matters is to know how much you are worth and how much you can give to others. The opinions of others are secondary.
5. Don't set your own limits
The person who often feels ignored considers emotionally less expensive to forgive than to confront another person for the offenses received
In one way or another, we end up justifying the offender. We forget that everything has a limit and that it must be clearly established.
This may be difficult in the short term, but it will prevent us from being subject to long-term offense and aggression.
6. Think of respect as relative
All human beings deserve respect. It doesn't matter if you are tall or short, ugly or beautiful, intelligent or not, rich or poor, black or white.
However, it is common to think that we deserve respect only if they are able to make their own contribution, to do something for someone. This is a serious mistake.
We deserve respect for the simple fact of being human, as well as animals and plants. Nobody has the right to abuse you, even if you make a mistake or act inappropriately.
7. Feeling ignored due to self-esteem issues
When feeling ignored becomes a constant, it is harder to notice that you are being abused. It seems like a normal situation to endure.
Sometimes we don't think enough about how we are treated by others or the effects of abuse on our lives. Maybe it's time to think about it.
Conclusions
Feeling ignored often and unfairly happens because deep down you have a negative idea of ​​yourself. Even so, you want to be kind to others and more important to everyone. It is clear, however, that the wrong strategy is being chosen to achieve this goal.
