Dealing with a stressful situation is not an easy task. Life tests us and sometimes forces us to resort to some strategies to face the most difficult times and learn from it.
Written and verified by the psychologist GetPersonalGrowth.
Last update: 15 November 2021
How to deal with too stressful situations? It is almost a survival strategy. Mathematician and astronomer John Lubbock argued that a day of worry is far worse than a day of hard work, and in fact it is. The mental energy we use in times of pressure, anxiety and difficulty is truly enormous.
On the other hand, there is another fact that needs to be taken into consideration: the ability to cope and manage stressful episodes varies greatly from person to person. There are those who elaborate their reality in a positive way, adopting a more resilient life perspective and seeing in every challenge an opportunity for growth and even a challenge.
Still others worry about everything. What causes a lot of stress for some is just one more task or situation for others, without too much pressure or anxiety. It all depends on our experience and psychological resources which, not always being congenital, can be learned and made one's own.
Albert Ellis in his famous book What anxiety! How to control her before she controls you, he states that to some extent both anxiety and stress are dimensions that are not free from positives. Indeed, they warn us of situations that require change.
We must therefore equip ourselves with the necessary courage to succeed, because it will also be good for our well-being. We therefore invite you to work on it, which is why in the next few lines we will see how to deal with too stressful situations.
"Life is not what happens to us, but what we do with what happens to us."
-Aldous Huxley-
How to deal with too stressful situations
We know that keeping stressful situations under control is a challenge for which we often do not feel prepared. However, what is really meant by “too stressful moments or situations”?
Although stress is above all a reality linked to individual perception, there are common scenarios or events that most of us are able to overcome.
Having to deal with surgery, legal and judicial problems, or even certain professional commitments puts most people under pressure. Each of us will surely have more than one example in mind of what is too much for ourselves or which is difficult to manage.
By way of example only, when it comes to knowing a patient's coping strategy, two specific factors are taken into consideration:
- How does he perceive the difficult situation that awaits him (primary evaluation).
- The patient's interpretation of his or her ability to cope with the stressful situation (secondary evaluation).
The ideal is that both spheres are adequate. The best thing is to perceive this challenge as affordable and have the resources to manage it. So let's see what resources we should put in place to keep too stressful situations under control.
It is not about making stress "disappear", but about dealing with it
One cannot live without anxiety or stress. These mechanisms ensured our survival, guided our progress and acted as an emotional and behavioral conjunction that allowed us to make changes. Below, we report what is useful to know about too stressful situations:
- Stress must be used in your favor to allow you to adopt adaptive behaviors.
- It is not necessary to make it disappear, but rather to keep it under control and manage it.
- To manage stress, each of us must find the strategies that best suit our needs and personality. This process takes time and effort.
Stress management starts from three specific dimensions, which we will analyze below.
Strategies focused on evaluation, a key aspect to deal with too stressful situations
How do you evaluate a challenge, a problem or a difficult situation that awaits you? When we label such situations, thoughts, emotions and behavior are totally conditioned. Thoughts like “it's too much for me”, “it's terrible”, “it's impossible”, “it's beyond my means”, “it's a disaster”, etc., will further intensify the stress and anxiety.
We must therefore pay attention to the type of evaluation we make with respect to the event that awaits us. Do not fall into excess of positivity, but even less into total negativity. The most appropriate thing to do is to opt for this type of evaluation:
- It's something I have to do. It is normal for me to feel stress, but I will be able to cope with it.
- I know this is a difficult situation. It might not be good, but I will learn from this experience, whatever happens.
How to deal with too stressful situations? Emotional strategies
As we all know, the emotional plan is crucial when it comes to keeping stressful events under control. It can give us the momentum and impetus to face anything or lock us in a corner in fear. As much as possible, we should try to manage this inner universe in our favor. How? Here are some tips:
- Identify the emotions that linger within you.
- Rationalize. Identify the irrational thoughts that fuel those emotions.
- Do breathing and relaxation exercises. Practices like mindfulness can help in these situations.
Problem-focused strategies
We have learned the importance of evaluating the problem or challenge in a realistic and appropriate way; avoiding thoughts that invalidate and fuel anxiety. We also know that it is crucial manage emotions by exploiting them in our favor. What is left to learn to cope with stressful situations? Perhaps we are missing the most important element: having a plan.
- Develop strategies that allow you to address the problem in the best possible way.
- Create your own survival kit so that you are prepared for anything that might happen.
- If it's a job interview, get ready. If it concerns a medical examination, practice relaxation techniques and visualize all possible scenarios and situations, to be prepared for everything. In the case of a meeting, a negotiation or any important professional commitment, read up, study, learn communication techniques, etc.
To conclude, stressful situations inevitably arise throughout the course of life. It is also natural to be afraid, but the secret lies mainly in the action regardless of the stress experienced, so as to surpass oneself in any adverse circumstance.
