When looking for information about assisted fertilization, what we find are almost always complicated articles that try to explain every detail of the procedure to the couple. In these texts we present the procedure step by step, of course, doing
reference to factors that can increase or decrease the success rate, such as the age of the mother or the diseases she suffers from. In all this information we quickly realize that something is missing: emotions.
We know very well that stress and depression seem to play a small role in the likelihood of becoming pregnant following this procedure. According to a study published in 2005, which included 166 women undergoing IVF treatment, emotions
negative were not decisive for the success of the technique. However, this does not mean that the couple did not experience many different emotions, often contradictory and heartbreaking.
The fact is that the couple who tries to conceive a child, but fails to do so, is as if they are spinning on a carousel of emotions that rotate incessantly. Happiness, restlessness, despair, delirium, anguish, anger ... many emotions are experienced in a relatively short time.
The first problem these people face is the social pressure and constant wonder of those who don't know that they have difficulty conceiving: when will you have children? This common and apparently harmless question continually awakens the sense of helplessness and generates pressure in both of us, a tension that, if not managed correctly, ends up exploding.
At some point it is decided to undergo fertility treatment, then usually a long journey begins in the sign of hope and disappointment. Life as a couple begins to fill up with dating and the scientific lexicon of terms like oocytes, zygotes…, and at first it can all seem quite disconcerting, but then it will become normal.
If the couple has told family and friends that they are interested in having a baby, then these questions will remind them that they are experiencing continued failure. Even if close friends will support them, their questions will sometimes be as annoying as a lot of little teasing.
When traditional methods don't work, IVF is usually used. At this point, the couple already habitually coexists with a certain degree of demotivation due to constant disappointments. If we add to this that the woman also undergoes hormonal treatments, we can understand that emotions are on the surface. At this point it is essential that the man is able to support and understand his partner, if he can, usually the relationship is strengthened and filled with tenderness.
How to manage emotions assertively?
1. Don't get obsessed, plan activities together and socialize. While stress doesn't affect the success of IVF, it can hurt you emotionally.
2. If friends and family are bothering you with their questions, let them know what your problem is. Tell them that when there is any news you will let them know.
3. Practice relaxation techniques, perhaps along with a yoga class, take time to go for walks in nature more than once a week, try acupuncture or ask a psychologist for help to learn how to apply the relaxation techniques (usually all fertility clinics have a psychologist who can help and guide the couple).
4. Find out in detail the odds you stand without being overwhelmed by naive optimism. The positive results of in vitro fertilization in women under the age of 34 amount to 41%, but in women over 45 the probability that this function is practically non-existent, so in the latter case it is almost always recommended to use eggs from a younger donor, in this way the chances of success increase by almost 50%.
5. Choose a modern clinic. In recent years, the success rates of assisted fertilization have increased, in large part this is due to the development of technology, so it is important that the clinic you choose has state-of-the-art technology available.
