How to forget an ex boyfriend who doesn't want you anymore?
I want to stop suffering but I can't forget it!
How to forget a guy you still love?
If you are asking yourself these questions I know how you feel ... maybe a love story that ends is one of the greatest disappointments that can be faced in life, at least for the one who is abandoned.
To forget a love and stop suffering, moving on with your life, really seem like impossible feats at this stage. For this reason in this article I want to give you some advice on how to forget a guy, and minimize the negative consequences of the end of your story!
Know that it is impossible to erase a person from your head overnight, especially if your love story has been very intense, but if you apply the 8 tips contained in this article you will return to smile faster than you would have imagined.
Forget ex: psychology
If you want to know how to forget an ex boyfriend, or how to forget a man who is no longer part of your life, there is a very important first consideration to make.
When you were still with him your whole life had acquired a well-defined balance. The daily activities, goals, projects and a good part of the thoughts of your day were related to his presence, which in some ways had begun to constitute the meaning of your existence.
A binomial had formed between you, a communion of intentions, almost a fusion. You no longer existed and he no longer existed: your individualities had come together to form a whole, in which you had inevitably begun to identify yourself. Since your story ended it's as if you felt deprived of your identity ...
You are afraid that there is nothing left in your life, and that left to yourself you will no longer be able to find meaning, to start over and fill that terrible void that he has left in you.
You feel just like that, right?
I know because I've been through it too, and that's why I want to tell you that the key to forgetting an ex and feeling better again is regain possession of one's identity.
You existed even before you knew him, and you will always exist, regardless of his presence in your life. Now is the time to come to terms with yourself and move on. All the advice I am about to give you is intended to help you in this process.
How to forget an ex boyfriend
So let's see 8 effective tips and techniques on how to forget a guy and permanently stop feeling bad for love.
1. Accept the end of your story
The first step is to accept the end of your relationship.
I always recommend making an attempt to get your ex back if it's worth it, and I've written many articles about it, which I invite you to read. However, when you realize that it is impossible or that it is not worth it, you have to completely accept the idea that you and him will never be together again, and each of you will go your own way from now on.
It is not a tragedy: it is simply the beginning of a big change for your life, and whether this change will be positive or negative depends only on you and how you will react to this event.
The breaking of a balance that had formed always causes fear, but most of the time it represents an opportunity to grow, and to subsequently find an even more mature and happy balance.
2. Process the pain
Pain at this stage will be your inseparable travel companion. Sometimes it will leave you up at night, other times it will make it impossible for you to focus on the other important things in your life, or even just enjoy a nice evening with friends.
It is really bad to feel bad like this, and the will to get distracted and get rid of negative emotions is always very strong, but we must be careful not to make mistakes that would only complicate our healing process ...
As I explain in my book, it is necessary to accept the negative emotions that appear within us, rather than trying to escape from them. By keeping busy or trying to distract ourselves from the pain at all costs, we would be left with a deep psychological wound still open and bleeding.
Instead, we must devote ourselves to pain and learn to listen to it and heal it, to disinfect the wound, to make sure that it heals little by little and no longer leaves negative aftermath in our psyche and in our heart. This is the only way to completely get over the end of a romance and quickly forget about your loved one.
There are very effective techniques to speed up the process, to promote psycho-emotional healing, and to ensure that a broken heart returns intact as quickly as possible. All chapter 4 of my e-book Starting over is dedicated to this topic.
If you follow the process outlined in my book, you will see that within a few weeks you will no longer need to think about him at all, as the pain will have done its natural course, and you will be completely healed.
Remember that the greater the pain, the greater the lesson and growth opportunity you can draw from it.
3. Carry out a cleaning
You can't think of forget an ex boyfriend if you continue to live in an environment that reminds you every two seconds of its existence. Take photos, gifts and any items that remind you of him; put them in a box and take them away from your room. If you want, you can put them back when you feel better.
If he left something of his own in your house, send it to him and forget about it.
Hide, delete or block it from all social networks and your address book. Delete old messages, or at least archive them to no longer have direct access to them.
Being drastic at this stage is really very important, because it will help you give a clean cut with the past, eliminate all the chains that still keep you tied to him, and really start moving on with your life again.
4. Move towards genuine things
There are many things you may have already tried trying to forget your ex, like getting drunk, going dancing with your friends, or going out with guys you met on Tinder or at some club.
The truth is that these types of businesses they don't help you feel better, and indeed they could only accentuate that sense of lack of yours towards the ex.
The reason is simple: vices, nightlife, casual sex and online dating can give you momentary relief but then leave you. a void inside.
I'm not saying that in general these are bad things, but at this stage of your life where you are particularly vulnerable, instead of making you feel better they would just make you more depressed, and think about how great the story was with him.
So what is the solution?
Move towards genuine things, that make you feel good. Go out during the day, put yourself in situations that make you see people at their best, not their worst.
Cultivate relationships with your best friends, and generally try to develop authentic relationships with new people. You can also try dating another guy, but try to approach it from the point of view I proposed.
When you miss a person and it seems to you that life has no meaning, the key is to throw yourself into experiences that reinforce a positive perception towards the world and people, rather than gravitating around situations that lack meaning.
5. Rediscover your passions
We all have passions, or at least interests, that can give meaning to our life and help create that sense of self that each of us has.
If you feel that lately, by being with your ex, you have given up or forgotten to explore e cultivate your passions, this is the right time to start over.
Anything goes well: sign up for a dance or photography class, write a book or poetry, study a new language, start yoga. You will see that you will feel much better, and you will soon be able to fill that emptiness that he has left inside you.
6. Work on yourself
The end of a story, as I have already told you, really represents an excellent starting point for growth. You can't even imagine how much you could improve yourself and your life. If you are now feeling overwhelmed by grief and wondering how to forget an ex boyfriend, I assure you that the ultimate solution is to start a job on yourself.
Read one of these personal growth books, try to find your way in life, set goals to achieve and become more aware of the man - woman dynamics by reading the articles on relationships contained in this blog.
Join the gym and change your look to feel more beautiful.
Cultivate love for yourself, because it is the only love story that will last a lifetime ?
7. Keep a journal
Using a journal can be another great way to process pain and get back to feeling better faster.
I recommend that you cut out one every day half an hour of time to write about how you feel, what hurts, makes you angry or saddens you.
Describe your negative feelings very accurately, but also track the progress you are making on your healing journey. For sure there will be many every day.
8. Break free from your ex's obsession
Sometimes the feelings of pain can turn into a real obsession, which does not allow you to take your attention away from the ex for the whole day. Fortunately, there are some very powerful techniques that can help you ...
Special cases
Let us now examine some particular situations. If you find yourself in one of these cases, keep in mind what you have read so far, and integrate it with the considerations I am about to make.
How to forget a boyfriend
If you want to know how to forget a boyfriend you have had a crush on for a long time, but have never been together with, I assure you that the procedure to follow is always the same.
You have to stop all the attention you are giving him. In a sense, you are trapped in a situation that is inconvenient for you, which in the long run will make you feel worse and worse and lead to lowering your self-esteem.
You deserve a guy who only wants you and for whom you are the most important thing in the world. That guy is not he.
Then go on with your life and follow the advice I have given you. You will see that you will come out of it very soon. The right person for you, maybe he's already out there waiting for you ?
How to forget an ex who made you suffer
If you want to know how to forget an ex who cheated on you or who made you suffer, the key is only one: to forgive.
Forgive him for what he did, perhaps by writing him one last letter or message, and then begin your healing process that you already know by now.
If you still don't feel ready to take this step, don't do it; you can forgive him when you feel better and are ready, but it is necessary that sooner or later you do.
I will tell you that it is not even necessary to send him a letter or a message: the important thing is that you take this step in your mind and that you are sincere as you do it. You will see that you will feel freed from a huge burden.
How to forget an ex you see every day
If you find yourself wanting to forget a guy you see every day, my first tip is to change round of friendships, in order to avoid contact with him as much as possible. If you work together or have the same social circle, don't be afraid to abandon the old to meet the new.
Starting to date new people, changing jobs, abandoning old friendships that are not authentic, in which your role was only that of "x's girl", can only do you good.
If you go to school together, or feel that it would be nearly impossible to avoid the places he goes to, accept the end of your story and tell him clearly. Tell him you're okay now, and you think breaking up was the best choice for both of you.
By doing so you will refuse to be considered by everyone as a poor victim, and you will take the first step towards a new and much more dignified reality for you. You will begin to condition your mind on the fact that you are strong and you don't need him. Soon you will also be able to forget him, ignoring him, or starting to think of him as a simple ex who doesn't interest you anymore.
Win back the ex
But maybe you are in another situation. You haven't given up yet, and want to make one last attempt to get your ex back and get him back to you?
All the tips you have read in this article are also essential in case you want to win someone back. At first it is in fact necessary to leave room for the ex partner and recover one's dignity and independence.
Well, for this article on how to forget about an ex that's it. I am convinced that now you know how to forget a guy who left you, or who made you suffer, even if you still love him.
Good luck for everything ?
