How to recover from a breakup? How to recover from a disappointment in love? Read on and find out everything there is to know on the subject.
A relationship that comes to an end, perhaps in the worst way, is not at all a pleasant experience to live, and in some cases it becomes a real nightmare.
For this reason, I decided to analyze love suffering from a psychological point of view, including four very useful tips that will help you understand how to recover from a breakup, so as to get out of the abyss and start living again.
So, if you can't move forward now that your relationship has ended, I assure you that this article will show you the right way to go. However, before continuing with the reading, I suggest you take the test you find below, which will allow you to understand if you are facing this delicate moment in the best way.
Recovering from a Breakup: Psychological Analysis
A difficult moment like that of the end of a love relationship destroys everything that up until a moment before represented our reality. Hence, it is only natural for one to occur impact on morale and on the quality of our life.
After all, strong feelings such as love and affection give us the same sensations (for better or for worse) that derive from the assumption of hard drugs. The impossibility of having a loved one by our side leads us to experience real abstinence crises!
Secondly, the end of a relationship can be compared to a bereavement: a person who has shared a lot with you now it's gone. So, it's physiological, as well as understandable, for you to literally feel broken.
After all, until a few days ago, every action of yours had the pronoun "we", While now you find yourself having to use a much more melancholy"io". This applies to every aspect of your life: deciding what to prepare for dinner, going to an event or choosing where to spend the Christmas holidays.
Consequently, one loses one's orientation and with it one's place in the world. This feeling of loneliness, I dare say cosmic, increases even more if the person who left us lived with us under the same roof.
So, you have nothing to be surprised if you feel bad now, especially if the relationship was very important, Know that tears, pain and loneliness will accompany you for a while, and you absolutely must not be ashamed of it. Its part of the game.
However, such a state will not last forever: time heals all wounds. Also, there are very important rules to follow, which will help you heal your broken heart much faster. I'll tell you about it in the following paragraph.
How to recover from a breakup: 4 practical tips
We have seen how the end of a relationship involves heavy repercussions on our life, but at the same time, I also anticipated that it exists a way to leave this bad time behind, once and for all.
So I leave you below 4 tips to put into practice to recover after a breakup and restart your life:
1. Let the pain go away
A person who was important to you is gone and now you feel disgusting.
Accept this state and the first step to start over has been taken. In fact, it is useless to try to pretend nothing has happened. After all, there is nothing wrong or exaggerated in what you feel. Maybe, your pride or strong character forces you to keep everything inside, but that's not the right way to act at all.
What happened to you has left a real wound in your soul and you need some time, if not to completely heal it, at least to stop the bleeding. To give an example that can better explain the situation, think of a marathon runner who, stubborn, wants to continue running even if he has a broken tibia. pretending to heal right away, without even splinting the leg.
The same goes for you: you cannot expect to return to everyday life if you don't recover at least a little. So, shed your tears and let all your frustration, anger, pain, and regret escape.
Also, if there is a risk, even if your pain is tremendous you absolutely must cut off all contact with the person you have to forget: this is a priority to recover from a sentimental breakup!
2. Forgive the person who has gone away
The second step to recovering from a breakup is to stop feeling resentful feelings towards the one, or the one who left. I know that now that you are reading, a bitter smile has spread across your face and you have started thinking something like "How can I forgive her if she did this to me ?!"
In fact, I have never said that this step is simple. Even more so if divorces or betrayals come into play. However, this is a crucial step. So, start working towards that. Abandon the worm that only revenge can give you the serenity you have lost and embrace the idea of ​​forgiving those who have hurt you.
After all, the pain you have inside will not disappear by punishing those who left you, but by rebuilding your life one step at a time. Obviously, it is a long and winding path, but forgive and move on, frees you of a huge weight, the same weight that maybe now keeps you nailed to the hell you are in.
3. Close this chapter forever
The next step is the child of the previous two.
You have given free rein to your pain and you have shed your tears, you have made all the poison that tainted your heart come out. Likewise, you have started an acceptance process, where you finally freed your life from the insane desire for revenge and hatred towards those who left you.
Now, it's time to end this chapter of your life forever. To do this, I suggest you perform a real ritual, so as to catalyze all your sensations into something physical: write a letter addressed to the ex partner.
Obviously, you won't have to send it, but as already mentioned, it will serve you to seal the moment: you have accepted that your relationship is over and you will never get back together, even if you have been hurt you have passed the moment and you have forgiven. Now, it's time to open up to life again!
Do not underestimate this moment, because it is the one in which you return to being for the first time a person free from pain and you do it by putting everything in black and white, as if the words you write on paper were carved in granite.
4. Rearrange your life
The process that leads to recovering after a breakup does not only involve cutting ties with the past, but also and above all from building new ones to stabilize the present and project into the future.
Now you are alone, or alone, maybe you have a lot of space left over at home. Well, know that that space has ceased to be the empty symbol left by those who are no longer there and it has become a new wing of your home, to be used as you see fit.
The same goes for time: by not being in a relationship anymore, you have a lot more free time to do what you like, so why do not make the most of this opportunity?
Certainly there are many things that you have recently overlooked, or that you have always wanted to start without ever having the chance. Now is the right time to do it: indulge your hobbies, join the gym, and take that journey you've always put off.
Plus, start hanging out and meeting new people. Talking to new people will help you find yourself, and gradually cover the emptiness that has been left within you.
How long does it take to recover after a breakup?
Many times I have heard phrases like: “I was dumped by my ex months ago, and I still can't recover from the breakup. Because? How long will it take?"
Although it has been calculated that on average it takes at least three months to start breathing after the end of a romance, this calculation it is not the result of an exact science.
First, the feelings of the person themselves come into play: some are more sensitive than others and therefore will be more reluctant to leave everything behind. While some people have a keen practical sense, not to mention cynicism, a very useful property in these situations, which it allows a faster path to rebirth.
In addition, you also need to calculate the time spent together, the type of relationship and the experiences shared. Leaving behind a marriage, perhaps with children, it will be much more difficult compared to overcoming a history of only six months.
Furthermore also how a story ended does matter. A betrayal, a fight or mistakes made by both sides, leave a trail of negative emotions that are much more difficult to dismiss.
Another important factor is the relationship that has been maintained with the ex, or with the ex. If you stay in touch, remain friends, or try in every way to win back your loved one, the wound will never be able to heal. When the decision is made to move forward, e you cut off all ties with the other person, the path is all downhill.
How to recover from a breakup: conclusions
We have seen how the path that awaits you before leaving behind a story that has ended is really tortuous, but far from impossible to go. It will certainly require a great deal of willpower and will not be without tears.
So, to help you, in addition to the advice above, although very valid, I want to leave you an additional resource to draw from to achieve your purpose.
Whether your story lasted six months or six years, You do not have to worry: its contents, from which I have also drawn a good part of the information reported in this article, will help you better.
