What are the righteous messages to win back an ex, or the right ones phrases to win back a girl after he left you? Surely this is what you are asking yourself, and through this article I will try to give you a complete and in-depth answer.
But first I want to tell you that there are no sentences to win back an ex that are universally good, since they will have to be adapted to your particular situation, and above all a single sentence or a single message is not enough to win back a girl.
Reconquest is a challenging path for which it serves a precise plan to follow, and the phrases to win back a woman that you will find in this article will be only part of it. In fact, you will also need to take into account the following factors:
- The reasons your story ended
- The mistakes you made after you were left
- The characteristics of your relationship
- The kind of person that you are, and the kind of person that she is
- How long has it been since you broke up
Phrases to win back an ex: the ones that don't work
Let's start by seeing together which phrases to win back NO they absolutely work and why. This is very important as it will help you understand the mistakes to avoid when texting a girl who left you.
Self-pity phrases
Avoid all phrases of self-pity, like a weak man, a doormat and a needy man. By making her feel sorry for her you will not be able to win her back, on the contrary you will distance her even further by making her understand that you are not worth anything. Examples to avoid:
- I can not live without you!
- Please give me another chance!
- I feel terrible, please come back with me!
- Since you left me my life has no meaning anymore!
Sweet love phrases
Unfortunately, love comedies and Disney movies have raised us with the belief that all we need to make a girl fall in love (or fall in love with us again) is to give her some kind of incredible speech in which we declare them. eternal love, and she will automatically fall into our arms.
Instead the reality is quite different ...
You absolutely must not give her further confirmation, show that you care and swear eternal love to her. She definitely left you for other reasons, not because she didn't believe you loved her, so there will be other solutions you will need to find to be successful in the reconquest. Examples of messages or phrases to avoid:
- You are my whole life, I've never loved anyone as much as you!
- We are made for each other, come back with me!
- If you come back with me I will never make you miss anything!
- I feel I can still make you very happy. You're everything for me!
Exaggerated apology phrases
If you have to apologize for something serious you did (because of which she left you), you have to do it with elegance, as I explain in depth in this article of mine. On the other hand, if you take responsibility for something you haven't done, or keep haunting her with constant apologetic messages while she's still angry, you will push her further and further away. Examples to avoid:
- I'm so sorry, I screwed it up, give me another chance!
- Please come back with me, I'll change!
- I am ready to change for you and for our love!
- I am a nobody ... forgive me please!
For a very detailed study on all the types of mistakes that you must avoid making during the reconquest process, and the strategy to follow if you have already committed them, I invite you to read chapter 3 of my ebook.
Messages and phrases to win back a girl
Below I will give you a series of messages to send or phrases to say in order to get a girl back. They are all very powerful, but they should only be used in situations and in the way I advise you to use them, and above all they must be calibrated to your particular case.
1. Phrase to win back a disappointed girl
The first sentence I want to introduce to you can be used to win back a girl who is disappointed or hurt by some of your behavior, or to win back an ex after a not-too-significant quarrel.
You can use it right after it's left, or a few days later, but if and only if you haven't already ruined everything by becoming a doormat and reacting very badly at the end of your relationship.
If you have already been self-respecting, insistent or pressing towards him it means that you have already lost your dignity, and then this sentence will not work for you.
This is what you will tell her, or write to her via a message:
Here's why this sentence is very effective:
- it makes her understand that you take your responsibilities;
- you show that you understand it and are willing to work hard to make things work;
- you create an equal dynamic, in which you too must commit;
- you show that you care;
- take the lead as a real man;
- you show that you are also willing to close it if things don't work out within 3 months.
But make sure you only use it if you haven't messed up after being dropped!
Here is a video (in English) of the famous dating coach Kezia Noble, which presents this sentence and explains how to use it:
2. Phrase to rebalance the dynamics between you two
If, on the other hand, you have already made many mistakes after being left, or the reasons for the end of your relationship are much more serious and deep-rooted (for example, a loss of interest in you), you will be forced to act in a completely different way.
Your ex is currently very angry with you, or is annoyed by the way you are pressuring her. Then the next logical step will be to distance yourself from the mistakes you have made by sending her a short message of apology, and then initiating the principle of no contact.
Thanks to this message you will be able to obtain several positive results:
- distance yourself from the mistakes you made after the breakup;
- rebalance the psychological dynamics between you and your ex;
- make her understand that you are moving forward with serenity.
After sending it, you will have to initiate the no contact, for a period of between 3 weeks and 3 months. And when I say no contact I mean it. NO CONTACT!
I know that you don't like the idea of ​​even temporarily closing contacts with your ex, but trust me, in more than half of the cases where a relationship ends, a period of separation is really necessary. By being persistent at this stage, not only would you not be able to win it back, but you would actually do it further away from you.
Should your ex be the first to contact you, I invite you to stay calm and not make hasty moves that show her excessive involvement. In some cases I even recommend not to answer at all!
3. Reopening message: a positive memory
After the no-contact period you will be able to contact her again, and you will have to do it with an original, intriguing, positive and at the same time light message. The ideal would be to take a cue from something that made you think of her, and that it meant something in your relationship. Something that she has positive memories associated with.
However, as I have already told you, it must be something of very light, at least initially. Let's see an example of a message to send to her:
This message can truly work wonders. Here's why it's so effective:
- you tell her that you have been thinking about her (but not that you are constantly thinking about her);
- you push her to remember a positive thing about your relationship, and to miss you;
- you make her understand that your life has gone on, and that you are enjoying yourself peacefully with your friends;
- lay the foundations for building a pleasant and light conversation.
4. Reopening message: useful news
A second possibility to reopen contacts is to communicate information to your ex that would certainly be useful, such as something related to her interest.
This message works because there is a clear reason why you are writing them. You're not begging, you're not seeking his attention for no reason e you're not putting any pressure on her… You are simply giving her information that certainly interests her, showing that you have a positive attitude towards her.
Second, you're not even forcing a conversation. If your ex was still mad at you and didn't want to talk to you, she might just ignore your message, as you didn't ask her any questions and ended with "I hope everything is going well in your life".
But rest assured that if you took the right steps during the no contact period, chances are she is super felice to receive that message from you, and the ensuing conversation between you two will be very positive and enjoyable.
5. Phrases to win back an ex on the phone
The third method you can use to reopen contacts with your ex after no contact is to make a short strategic call that it will surprise her and it will rekindle the emotions within her.
You pick up the phone, you call her and if she answers you say:
Hey! I'm glad you answered the phone. In a minute I have to close but ... I am with my friends, and we are in (a place that has a particular meaning for you, like a park, a city, a club) ... it made me rethink us, and it gave me a nice smile on your face ... How are you?
At this point she will answer you, telling you something about her life and making some considerations on the fact that she did not really expect a phone call from you. Then you will continue:
Great, I'm sure there are a lot of good news in your life and I hope to hear about them soon. Anyway now I really have to go back to my friends ... I just wanted to share this thought with you ... I wish you a nice day!
As you can see, the type of approach you have to follow is very similar to the other forms of opening I presented to you, but in this case the telephone contact will intensify everything: you will give her a emotional discharge much stronger.
This is why this method is very effective:
- I totally surprised her
- you give her a very strong emotional discharge
- show that you still have fun, you are with friends, you go in a hurry
- you show her that you don't need to go back with her and you don't even hold a grudge
- reestablish a connection with her, which you can take advantage of in the following days
If, on the other hand, for some reason she doesn't answer the phone, you can simply text her what you wanted to say verbally.
6. Message to re-create a connection
As you carry on with your conversation, you will need to be able to rebuild some of the basic relationship between you, and find a connection on an emotional level.
In a nutshell, you must begin, albeit cautiously, to show her that you still care about her, that you support her, that you are close to her, and that there is still something important between you two.
By letting her know that you are thinking of her, without making demands on her and without putting any form of pressure on her, your relationship will benefit a lot. You will likely be able to get a very positive reaction from her, prompting her to open up in turn, and show the feelings of affection she still has towards you.
7. Message to make your ex jealous
Now is the time to turn these emotions of affection into true attraction, and one of the ways to do this is to exploit jealousy.
As I explain in this article, jealousy must be used in a very subtle way, and according to the right timing, during the recovery process. One misstep could be very lethal, and destroy everything you've built up to this point.
Remember that you are sending her these messages to get her attention, not to make her angry. Let's see a good example of a sentence to win back an ex thanks to jealousy:
If all goes to plan, your ex will start wondering things like:
- Who is this friend?
- Have they seen a romantic movie together?
- Maybe they are dating?
- Maybe they had sex after the movie ??
8. Message to arrange a meeting with the ex
Now that you've re-established positive contact with your ex, and managed to get her attention, how do you go about seeing her again in person?
No, you don't have to invite her on a real date, as you risk putting a lot of unnecessary pressure on her. But you'll still have to figure out a way to get her to see you again, as the messages are only the first part of the plan. The real magic will have to happen in person.
The best way to arrange a meeting is to make sure you have a good reason to see her again, and most importantly, don't give the impression that you want to meet her to get her to come back with you. She must think that you have passed the end of your relationship, and that you now regard her almost as a friend.
In this way its barriers will lower, and his curiosity and interest in you will skyrocket. For example you could write them:
In short, write something simple and direct. It will work perfectly, and will lay the right foundation for both of you to experience the encounter with the right spirit.
For now, you need to appear friendly… any kind of flirtation or reference to your relationship could scare her and pull her away from you again. Save the flirting for when you see her in person: at that point you can read your ex's reactions well and adapt your moves accordingly.
Phrases to get back together: conclusions
I have given you some phrases to win back a girl, which I hope you will be able to use wisely and with the right timing. You are already in a much better position than you were in before landing on this web page ... you can count yourself lucky ?
But as I told you before, it is impossible think that it only takes a few sentences to get back together with an ex girlfriend. A powerful sentence said at the right time certainly represents an important point in your favor, but to convince her to get back with you sometimes it will be necessary a multitude of phrases, messages, positive interactions, phone calls and moments spent together live.
