We would probably be much happier if we gave up believing the myths of romance.
Last update: April 20, 2022
The idealization of love is a resource that poets, painters and musicians have used for several centuries. This has contributed to the spread of several myths that still circulate today and in which many of us believe blindly without stopping to think deeply about their validity or not. But what are the truths about love?
The problem is that we often have too high expectations, which is why no reality will live up to what we dream and expect.
This is why it will happen several times to feel disappointed by reality and to establish genuine bonds with others with difficulty.
In the following lines we analyze several myths about romance in order to dispel them and present the truths about love. This will allow you to live this precious feeling with greater awareness.
He who learns and learns and does not practice what he knows is like one who plows and plows and does not sow.
Plato
The truths about love
Love as a whole
Love idealized by romance becomes the center of the personal universe. It is the sum of the good and the point where all the roads of life lead; it represents redemption, salvation or the culmination of all desires.
It is often said that we will only be happy when we have found a partner. Likewise, it is common to think that love is the result of great sacrifices and hardships, in order to maintain the relationship at all costs. Secrets or personal spaces are not allowed.
Reality shows us the opposite. Those absolute deliveries, so everything revolves around the couple relationship, they have more to do with neurosis than with love as such.
Our life has multiple dimensions and not all of them can be shared with your partner. Many situations and people in life offer us moments of happiness, not only romantic love has that virtue.
There are also personal spheres that we consider private, those spaces that we like to reserve for ourselves. They are part of our self-knowledge process, of our individual exploration, of our life.
And it is neither disloyal nor selfish not to share them with your partner. It is simply a mechanism for preserving our individuality.
Truth About Love: You Don't Own Your Partner
The idea that the partner is our property fuels the belief that love is an overwhelming totality in which there is no room for individuality. It is stated, for example, that every true love must necessarily lead to marriage or, in any case, to coexistence lasting.
Si he also argues that jealousy is an absolutely legitimate display of passion. There are also those who affirm that it is one of the unequivocal signs of love: “He loves you, he is jealous of you”.
On the other hand, betrayal is tantamount to a massacre; it is a definitive proof of the lack of love, an insurmountable obstacle, a death offense.
Again, reality shows us that things are not exactly as presented by romantics. There is no way to guarantee that true love will lead to a stable union that will never break down over the years.
Love is not a static feeling and every day we see marriages that exhaust the feeling or relationships that end even if there is great affection on both sides.
We also know that cheating also occurs in couples who are very much in love. It doesn't necessarily depend on a lack of love, but it often has more to do with insecurities or personal emptiness than with relationship failures.
Conclusions
We would probably be much happier if we gave up believing the myths of romance. It would allow us to better appreciate reality and, perhaps in this way, we would stop desiring what does not exist and we could fully enjoy what we can expect from love.
Image courtesy of Elena Dijour
