Written and verified by the psychologist GetPersonalGrowth.
Last update: December 14, 2021
9 out of 9 people love the little details, without it having to be an important date, such as an anniversary, a birthday or various celebrations. Indeed, there is more: 9 out of 9 people appreciate more a sincere "how are you", and not a mere exchange of cordial and daily greetings, rather than a great gesture.
Most of us, in fact, love the little details because they are what feed our strength, our humility, our greatness, our bonds and our affections.
The small details reinforce closeness, basing our relationships on the care, attention and daily affection we give to the other.
It's the small details that make the difference
It is the small details that make the difference and it is they that help us to get used to the comfort that involves feeling loved, without movie phrases or principles that save us from the clutches of the dragon.
Why the real heroism lies in leaving a trace with small gestures and sowing goodness and then reaping greatness. After all, the important thing for us lies in our ability to collect the richness of everyday life.
We wait day after day to win the lottery or for a miracle to completely change our life, while we do not realize that the lottery is everything we can enjoy day after day.
Let's talk, for example, about a kiss, a hug, a conversation with a special person, our favorite dish, the road that leads to building a dream, an exciting movie, the joy of our dog when we return home. , an afternoon spent under the covers watching a movie and eating popcorn, fantasies and ambitions, a good read in good company.
We can enjoy all these "little things" every day and we don't realize it. What we pay attention to is being on a diet, going to the gym every day, or ending the relationship they asked of us at work. All this is fine, but what really matters is not to see the calendar sheets that scroll by without having collected precious moments and, with these, reasons to smile.
Collecting exciting moments means enjoying the small details
If we strive to become collectors of exciting moments, we will be able to enjoy the small details in life, which will help us strengthen our bonds and feel better every day.
To do this, we can keep an emotional diary in which to write all the small details that we enjoyed during the day and this will represent the link with our emotions.
From this diary, we can create a map of love that helps us flood the lives of the people we love with small and beautiful details. But, what is a love map?
According to psychologist John Gottman, the love map is a list that includes all the special details we need to know about the people we love. Knowing them and making them explicit helps us to pay more attention to all those daily episodes in which we can show our affection for them.
Paying attention and dedicating our time to drawing a map of love on the people we love leaves an imprint on our brain that will make it easier to access that information.
What do you need to know to map out the small details?
Before we can draw the small details action plan, we need to answer several questions like the ones we list below:
- What's your favorite dish?
- What are your favorite movies, TV shows or books?
- Who are the two people you deeply admire? Because?
- What are your favorite animals?
- What is the first thing he would buy if he won the lottery?
- What can we do to improve the relationship we have?
- Where would you like to go if you were to start a journey?
- What are the moments when you are happiest?
- What would he like to change about himself and others?
- How do you prefer to spend an afternoon at home?
- What are your dreams and desires?
- What are the chores or tasks that he performs best?
- What would you like to improve in your life?
- What literary genre does he like to read? What are the moments of reading him?
- Which magazines interest him?
- What is his favorite pastime when he is sick and cannot leave the house?
- What is your ideal gift?
- What is bothering him lately or what is causing him particular tension?
- What makes him proud of himself?
Answering these kinds of questions, you can create a map that helps you improve the small details of everyday life, a fundamental aspect to make the people you love feel special, unique and irreplaceable.
Images courtesy of Puung
