Last update: May 03, 2016
There are stages in life where we feel the need to tidy things up, to stop fighting to make ends meet; periods in which we wish to untie ourselves from expectations, from unspoken contracts that trap us, from needs. Sometimes we don't need to be overwhelmed by the attention of those around us, to see our achievements recognized or appreciated by others. There are times when all of this doesn't matter, when our only desire is to breathe a sigh of relief and FEEL EMOTIONS, to allow ourselves to be ourselves.
In this phase of life, the desire to solve the difficulties of others while neglecting one's own seems to fade more and more. Because sometimes breaking free from the problems of others, the ones that do nothing but consume us, is the best way to help. Indirectly, of course. Unplug, empty yourself and become aware of who we are.
To be happy, you have to give up some things
To be happy, it is necessary to give up some habits, such as repressing our emotions. Preventing ourselves from having certain feelings will only trap us. This is what happens, for example, with sadness, an emotion that we tend to keep hidden from the eyes of society.
In a world that bombards us with positive messages, we find it hard to understand that, to be happy, we need to welcome some approval, understand ourselves and give ourselves the opportunity to express ourselves - our every single emotion deserves to be heard.
It is a question of self-knowledge and growth. A real assembly of ourselves. By subtracting pieces from our puzzle, by suppressing sadness or by hiding our fears, the only thing we will achieve is to erase the smile from our face.
Why? Because we are hiding, we are neglecting that part of us that would like to tell us something and who wants us to feel listened to (or rather, self-listened to). For this reason, it is important to give us the opportunity to FEEL EMOTIONS, capitalized and uncensored.
Feeling emotions: the basis of our well-being
Feeling emotions is a key aspect of emotional health. The best release or abreaction mechanism we have is to break down the barriers we have erected around our emotional abilities by focusing on understanding what we feel.
Allowing ourselves to cry, treat our happiness, get carried away by surprise, reflect on our anger is the only way to really get closer to a full existence.
For this purpose, we can put into practice strategies such as mindfulness, a technique aimed at creating connections with what is happening and with the way we feel. In other words, to become fully aware of what is happening around us.
Another optimal system is to redirect our customs. We make a habit of noting how we felt during the day or how people around us made us feel. We will be able to recover this ability - and need - which now seems to have been lost, only by directing attention to our emotional experiences.
Reconnect with our emotional brain
In our brain reside the storm and the calm, both part of life. This is where everything is processed, where we charge and recharge our energies. The intensity of conflicts and experiences are processed by the amygdala, our sentinel of emotions.
With its almond shape and positioned above the brain stem, it is, together with the hippocampus, the part of the brain in charge of managing every aspect related to our emotions. The amygdala therefore acts as a storage point for our memories and impressions, and can explain why we sometimes give one answer rather than another.
In a sense, it becomes necessary to train the brain so that emotional experiences are not traumatic and can be solved easily. The amygdala, therefore, by "memorizing" the emotional climate, facilitates the management and coordination (collaborating with the prefrontal cortex) of the different emotions.
For this reason, it is important to literate our brain and not let it free itself from any feelings. Because there will come a time when we realize that perhaps we have spent our lives building barriers around us and reality, underestimating what each emotion had to tell us.