Last update: May 06, 2016
Since Aristotle said the phrase "love is composed of a single soul inhabiting two bodies", it seems that the concept of having a partner has totally adapted to this maxim. However, we often forget that Aristotle also said that "The powerful man is he who is master of himself".
It is evident that both statements are decontextualized, and we do not know how much Aristotle had to do with these concepts, but today they are useful for introducing the theme of this article: love in a couple can be very enriching, but you have to know that it is not a necessity.
A partner is not a necessity, but it can make us better
Let's take an example: there is a very important event, to which we are required to participate with the appropriate clothing, so we spend a lot of time thinking about how it is best to dress to respect the rule imposed on us.
"I don't want you to need me, I want you to count on me forever and for the hereafter to unite your home with mine"
(Elvira Tailor)
When we decide how to dress, we see that those clothes enhance our physical appearance. With the relationships we establish, more or less the same thing happens: our person is empowered.
Elegant clothes (having a partner) are not necessary, but, if we decide to wear them, we acquire further peculiarities that we would not have without them. It's like having a bonus: a partner is a bonus to gain new experiences, to have support and to receive teachings that can make us better, because we will also learn something from negative situations.
“Let me embrace you, now that your skin still does not bear the writings of the lies of the world, and that your lips are only the abode of beauty. Because I just wanted to be good and sincere, and you can make me so. Let me hug you"
(Juan Antonio Gonzalez Iglesias)
A couple with space and independence
In fact, having a partner is fortunate, as long as the couple respects emotional independence and personal spaces, since this is the only way we have available to fulfill ourselves and grow. In other words, in the couple there are two distinct lives that require their share of individual attention, in order to progress together.
When we realize that we are happy in solitude and that we don't need anyone, we understand the importance of these ideas. It often happens that the more someone wants to be attached to us, the more we are forced to flee, because we feel suffocated.
Love is not rational, but it still needs a little bit of thinking if we want the story to last. Wanting to be with someone means understanding that one day that person may leave, but that we will go on anyway, saddened, but complete.
Love is a decision, not an addiction
Love in the couple is not an addiction or even an obsession, even if during the first months of the story it may seem like that. In the initial phase we are enveloped by a cloud in which space and time are confused and we want to share them at all costs with each other.
What is certain is that obsessions are not healthy and can lead us to have toxic relationships, in which we stop giving weight to ourselves to live in a false world and far from reality, a world in which we move with a blindfold. .
If we decide to start a relationship as a couple, it is because we are convinced that we are ready to fall in love, but also to continue to cultivate self-love. We choose to start a story and we choose to end it because we don't belong to anyone and because nobody belongs to us, even if many times we have been led to believe the opposite.
"And there is one thing I can swear:
I, who fell in love with your wings,
I will never ever cut them off "
(Carlos Miguel Cortes)
