An article on limiting beliefs and what to do to eliminate them.
"Our life is the result of our thoughts."
Marco Aurelio
Our beliefs dictate our days. Like invisible chains, the limiting beliefs they choose for us what we will think and do: minute by minute, day after day, week after week.
I recently read that in circuses baby elephants are tied up with chains very heavy: in the first weeks of life, the little elephants try to free themselves in every way, without succeeding. Over time, they become convinced that there is no way out e they give up. For this reason, adult elephants are tied with light ropes: they could free themselves easily, but they are convinced that it is not possible.
A conviction is therefore something that we believe to be true: it doesn't matter whether it is or not.
Where do our beliefs come from
Are you ready? What I am about to tell you is the holy grail of every whiner: it's all our parents' fault!
Ahhhhh… how does it feel to be completely empowered by your failures ?!
- Are you convinced that you are unable to achieve your goals? The fault of mom and dad!
- Think you don't deserve to make money? Your old men are to blame!
- Do you feel intimately that others don't like you? Guess what…? It's your parents' fault!
Whether they did it intentionally or not, our parents have profoundly influenced our worldview, since our earliest years of life. And as if that weren't enough, in the following years our teachers / professors, friends, Vespa, Santoro, and society in general also joined!
A big problem right? But at this point you are presented with a choice: you can continue to be a whimper and gloat in the idea that the situation you are in is irremediably the fault of the "bad and ugly" world, or ... you can choose to change your beliefs.
Changing one's limiting beliefs is not easy. Limiting beliefs, like many traps of our mind, perform a very specific task: they give us security, they make us feel at ease. If you don't feel like facing this change, it is useless to keep reading: this is the link for facebook; we'll talk about it when your beets have ripened on Farmville ;-)
... if instead you have chosen to continue reading, to expose your limiting beliefs, here is where to start.
How to change our limiting beliefs
To undermine mental patterns that have been sedimented for years, you will have to face a real brainwashing. Here are the three key steps:
- Become aware of your limiting beliefs. In any path of change and personal growth, awareness is the first step. To identify our limiting beliefs it is enough to look at our thoughts: what is it that we keep repeating to ourselves? Why do we make certain choices? What are the thoughts that most often occur to our mind? What is it that scares us? Take 30 minutes of your time, and try to write your beliefs on a sheet of paper: what do you think is necessary to achieve your goals? To make money? To succeed in studies? To be appreciated by others?
- Rephrase your limiting beliefs in reverse. Once you have identified your limiting beliefs, simply try to reverse them. Here's an example: "life is just a matter of c ** o" becomes "life is just a matter of choices" and so on. Rereading the new beliefs, you will probably smile: "nahhh, it's not possible, all bullshit". Here you have just found another limiting belief to add to your list and rephrase: "anything is possible, changes can really happen".
- Look for confirmations for your new beliefs. Do you think the new beliefs are unrealistic? Make an effort to look for evidence of their existence in the success stories of those who have achieved the goals you aspire to, observe the people around you, man ... use Google! By giving substance to your new beliefs, you will begin to think that they are not so unrealistic, but above all, you will dismantle your old beliefs, one brick at a time.
You are now an "adult elephant": free yourself from your chains.
