Last update: 18 March, 2018
All of us, at least once in our life, have mourned. A process that consists of a series of phases that follow one after the other and that allow us to assimilate and deal with a loss. Yet, it is sometimes a painful process that forces us to stay in a particular phase longer than we should. The phrases about pain we are going to tell you about in this article will bring you some light and hope if you are going through a moment like this.
The bereavement phrases we offer are not only positive, but will also help you reflect on what it takes to deal with a loss and all that can be learned from a similar experience. At the same time, they will help to understand which attitudes to avoid and which ones are positive.
“Don't be obsessed with the idea that you have to feel better. Everyone has his own times. Remember that your worst enemy during pain is you, if you don't love yourself ”.
-Jorge Bucay-
Phrases for dealing with a loss
1. There is no pain worse than that which does not speak
This quote from Henry Wardsworth emphasizes the great weight we carry on our shoulders when we don't voice our pain. When faced with a loss, we suffer, but sometimes circumstances push us to keep up appearances.
Not crying in public, not expressing our emotions for fear of others seeing us weak are barriers that prevent us from accepting and coping with loss. All this causes an increasingly prolonged load on our shoulders. In addition, the burden of not expressing what we feel can turn into a deep depression.
It is important to give ourselves the opportunity to express our feelings. Repressing them is only harmful.
2. Mourning is good. It is the way to move through the transitions of life
It is one of the Rick Warren quotes that invites us to see this process as an opportunity to say goodbye to the person who left us.. Sometimes we feel that we have not had the opportunity to do so, and grief allows us to gradually let it go.
Still, this sentence from Warren it also invites us to see mourning as a preparation for a new phase in our life. A phase in which that person will not be physically present, but will still remain in our heart.
Coping with a loss allows us to transform the relationship we had with that person, and it helps us understand that life goes on.
“To live the essence of life with great love, face destiny and accept it. Learn that our state is always transitory and a source of enrichment "
-Amparo Carmona-
3. Mourning is a process, not a state
At the beginning of the article, we said that sometimes mourning lasts longer than it should. In this regard, we quote a quote from Anne Grant who reminds us that mourning is a process, not a state. A series of stages from which we must pass and ranging from denial to fear and sadness, up to the acceptance of loss. The phases of this process do not always follow the same sequence.
Despite this, many people get stuck in one of these stages. The risk is to live with denial for too long, even going so far as to abandon oneself to sadness for the rest of one's life. Grant's phrase is in this sense an invitation to open your eyes and realize how pain is not a state.
Believing that it is prevents us from moving on with our lives and being happy. It is important to learn to let go of the person who is no longer with us. We have to let it go, even if it hurts tremendously. Trust me, you will benefit from it.
4. Mourning challenges us to love once again
This is one of Terry Tempest Williams' quotes that invites us to see this process as a challenge. Some people are unable to cope with a loss e they deny themselves the possibility of loving someone else for fear of forever losing the deceased person. Still, it's a risk worth taking.
Everything has a positive and a negative value at the same time. If we didn't have to face sadness, we wouldn't value happiness. For this reason, Even though we will face different losses throughout our lives, experiencing the different stages of mourning helps us shake ourselves up and run the risk of loving again.
“Only those who avoid love can avoid the pain of suffering. The important thing is to grow through pain and continue to be vulnerable to love ”.
-John Branter-
5. Do not protect yourself from grief with a fence, but with your friends
This Czech proverb is extremely illuminating. Sometimes, when we suffer from a loss, we close in on ourselves and isolate ourselves from others. We put aside friends, family and social life, suddenly stop doing everything we liked.
It is as if putting a barrier could protect us from the pain we feel, while in reality, we do nothing but give it even more strength. It is good to spend time with ourselves and our pain, but it is equally important to share it and allow others to support us.
When we find hands ready to support us, friends ready to hug us and words ready to console us, the pain is disposed of in a healthy way. Isolating ourselves from others can cause our pain to consume us without leaving.
"The world is round and that place that may seem like the end may instead be the beginning."
-Baker Priest-
Have you ever faced moments of pain? How did you overcome them? The grieving quotes we have seen help us become aware of this process and how our emotions can help us overcome difficulties. What seems like an end is not always an end. Sometimes that ending can actually hide a new beginning, a new opportunity, or just a different way of relating to the person who left.