Last update: Augusts 10, 2015
The word pre-occupation, as the term itself suggests, means to take care of something ahead of time.
When we are preoccupied with tomorrow, we fail to enjoy the present, the today, the present moment. That is to say, worries paralyze the present and, more seriously, immobilize the here and now.
How many times has it happened to you that you have not been able to fall asleep because you were mulling over a problem? This waste of energy, used to evaluate an infinite number of possibilities, causes physical and mental fatigue that will have the opposite effect to the desired one: when we have to face and manage the problem in question, we will be exhausted and our ability to make decisions will be compromised.
This occurs if the problem is real and concrete. How many times do you mull over an imaginary problem?
There are people who fall into an infinite tunnel of worries, creating imaginary monsters, an infinity of unpleasant consequences that can occur in a more or less long period of time..
These people do not live in the present, the moment, because they are too preoccupied with solving problems that in 90% of cases will not even occur. We humans are an interesting species, aren't we?
We like to ruin our lives for no reason.
And don't confuse lack of worry with laziness or irresponsibility, because those who are not worried will address the problem or issue when they have to, while the lazy or irresponsible will avoid dealing with it altogether..
At this point we encourage you to get rid of your worries, practice the “carefree life”, that is, a carefree life!
Cut it out!
When your mind prepares to run a marathon of 50 imaginary problems, stop it. Let it breathe. When your life is at a fast pace and your thoughts go at 100 per hour, know that this speed pushes your mind beyond rationality, to the point of wanting to embrace the future.. Become a futurologist, make predictions as fateful and unlikely as your degree of concern.
Be rational. Do a reflective analysis
Faced with a recurring concern, try to caricature it. This does not mean that you have to ridicule it or avoid taking it into consideration, but take it to the extreme, which is to imagine what is the worst that can happen.. You will see that it is not as bad as you thought. If you think about it calmly, you will understand that the chances of the worst happening are insignificant.
There are things that are beyond our control, such as life, death, natural disasters or accidents. And as far as we care about it, nothing changes, it won't help. You have to learn to live life without worries, so you will be better prepared to deal with such situations should they arise. Your mind will not be exhausted by the constant anticipation of what may or may not happen to you and then you will be able to successfully resolve the matter..
Delegate to others
Even if they make you sick, your partner's (or anyone else's) problems don't concern you, they are their problems. Be empathetic and try to help him as much as you can, but don't appropriate his dilemmas. Don't bother with other people's problems that don't concern you, you've had enough of your own.
Forget the "ifs" and "buts"
The "ifs" are those imaginary friends who have the good habit of interrupting your thoughts, triggering an infinity of doubts. "What if it is not the right decision ...?", "What if tomorrow they fire me ...?".
The "ifs", instead of helping you, cause unnecessary stress. If the decision is incorrect, the mistake will be useful to you next time. If you get fired tomorrow, well, then don't worry because you can work as a successful fortune teller thanks to your "ifs".
Because, most of the time, the "ifs" are wrong. Therefore, calculate the time of the week you can devote to these forecasts and start thinking about more constructive ways to use them..
Focus on the present
When you surround yourself with too many worries, you don't mind real time. You live in a fictional tomorrow that prevents you from enjoying a coffee with a friend, a book you had a great desire to read, a conversation or, simply, the wonderful feeling of relaxing and not thinking about anything..
Learn to get rid of worries. Go out, breathe, observe, listen, savor and feel every moment. With all the senses you have at your disposal. Time flies and past moments never return. Put aside your "ifs" and your "buts", because today you have other more beautiful things to do!
