If you are having problems with your partner, you may be interested in knowing how to improve relationship communication. Here are 5 tips you should follow.
Last update: May 28, 2022
While communicating with others is essential for resolving conflicts or expressing your ideas, it is not always done in the right way. And one area where communication is extremely important is that of romantic relationships. How many times have you thought that everything was fine, but instead there was more than one problem? Today we present some strategies with which to put an end to misunderstandings and improve couple communication.
First of all, you have to think that if you don't pay attention to the way you communicate with your partner, there will most likely be misunderstandings and breakups. The distrust, the lies, the frustration of never facing problems… All these problems will gradually get bigger and bigger.
To avoid hurt, remorse and strengthen the foundations of union, it is worth the effort to improve couple communication.
How to improve couple communication in 5 steps
1. Don't argue hot
The first tip for improving relationship communication is avoid, at all costs, talking or discussing something when the nerves are still uncovered.
Anger often leads to uttering words that hurt the people you love the most. Better to stall, then.
A useful exercise in these cases is to write in a journal or paper how it feels. This will help to focus on emotions and, above all, to manage the most intense ones.
Writing also helps you to choose and understand what you want to convey to your partner, with more calmness.
During an argument or a fight, it is best to use the "talk later" tactic. This will serve to communicate when tempers are calmer. However, it must not become an excuse to avoid confrontation or postpone it indefinitely.
2. The past is not a weapon
Using certain past situations to hurt your partner is always tempting, but it's a serious mistake. Conflicts must always be resolved with the present in mind.
If the discussion doesn't turn out the way you want it, you may have missed an opportunity as a couple, but that doesn't mean you should blame your partner at the earliest opportunity.
To improve communication as a couple, we suggest you do an exercise to understand how you speak to your partner during an argument. After arguing, think back to everything you said.
For example, "you are selfish", "you already did it once", "do you remember when ...?". In this way we will identify all those references to the past that we use unconsciously or not.
3. Listen to understand
Another very useful way to improve couple communication is to open your ears, physically and metaphorically. How many times have you seen arguments in which two people scream and talk at the same time without listening to each other?
If you don't listen to your partner, you can never understand their point of view. This does not mean that you will passively accept his arguments, but by listening to what he has to say you can negotiate and reach an agreement. Otherwise, there will be no understanding and the problem will remain unsolved.
4. Be direct to improve communication as a couple
Write this sentence somewhere to always keep it in mind and remember what it means. Many times, you cannot speak clearly. We use irony, sarcasm or instigate the other with phrases such as "you know very well what there is".
Are you really sure that your partner can read your thoughts? Never take anything for granted. Being direct and clear is essential to improve communication as a couple. It means avoiding and resolving conflicts without wasting time.
If you don't like something, look for the clearest way to say it. Over the next 4 days, try to analyze how you feel when you are silent or not direct with your partner.
You will probably feel ashamed or perhaps you will begin to doubt that the other person can understand you simply by observing you. Analyzing your own behavior and emotions will help improve communication as a couple.
5. Act as a team
The last tip for improving communication as a couple concerns the ability to see the relationship as a team effort. When there are conflicts, sometimes there is a tendency to blame the other party. This makes the couple lose the perspective: you play on the same team, you are not rivals. Always keep this concept in mind and tackle problems together, cooperating.
How do you communicate with your partner? Do you tend to wait until you are sure what to say? There are many mistakes that affect couple communication, due to ignorance or bad examples probably seen in the family.
We advise you to follow the advice given to eliminate many of the conflicts; they will disappear because you have changed the way you communicate.
"The important thing is not to be the same, but to form a good team."
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