Last update: April 30, 2018
You have heard thousands of times that you have to learn to appreciate yourself. If the circumstances of our life have been favorable, we will probably have no problem giving ourselves the value we deserve, much less understanding how this manifests itself. If we have had experiences that have made us doubt our worth, however, perhaps we do not know how to change the situation.
Learning to appreciate yourself means finding a way to see, assimilate and incorporate the idea of ​​being a person who deserves like anyone else. Not to be inferior to anyone in terms of value, to be able like anyone else to achieve the set goals. And also not to need mechanisms and strategies to hide, defend themselves or confront others to protect their own value.
"You yourself, like everyone else in the entire universe, deserve your love and affection."
-Buddha-
It is not at all easy to go from low to strong self-esteem. It takes time, effort and patience. However, it is possible. It is not about reaching a point where there is total complacency with your present and past person. The secret is to remedy some aspects so that the lack of self-esteem does not interfere with one's life. Below we present three strategies for learning to appreciate yourself.
Learn to appreciate yourself
1. Be yourself
The phrase "Be yourself" is certainly not original. But how do you get there? How can we connect with our inner world to show us what we are like?
What we are aiming for is not to provide you with a magic formula or to deceive you by creating false optimisms. Actually be oneself is not for nothing easy, especially when you have experiences in which the only way to survive was to stop being yourself. Very restrictive environments try to break our will to be.
For example, when you grow up or spend a lot of time in a environment too critical, it is not easy to cultivate self-confidence. And, of course, even less learning to appreciate yourself. Far from it. We end up convinced that we are worth little or nothing, denying ourselves or minimizing ourselves.
The only way to start being ourselves is by allowing ourselves to be. In other words, stop thinking too before acting. Before talking. Ignore that little voice that tells you "Wait, don't do this" or "Wait, don't talk". Start doing it in uncompromising situations and then continue like this. Nothing is achieved without consistency. Otherwise, you run the risk of acting without thinking or talking and letting everything flow unfiltered.
2. Coping with fear, especially failure
Failure is an oversized concept, especially among those who don't know how to appreciate themselves. If we examine it carefully, we see that all human beings have made thousands of mistakes and can only boast a few important successes.
Mistake and failure are our daily bread. Today there is such an obsession with success that many end up developing the panic of failure. They forget that only exceptionally and in strange ways, a great triumph is not preceded by countless failed attempts.
If you let yourself be invaded by fears, especially that of failure, è impossible to learn to appreciate yourself. The greatest virtues are brought out in failure, not in moments of success.
3. Accept the limits without complaint
To learn to appreciate yourself, there is nothing better than being humble. THEhumility it is not consenting to everything, but understanding the vulnerability of the human condition. Also accept that we are part of this humanity, full of errors, shortcomings and gaps. If we have a strong love for ourselves, it does not scare us or make us feel inferior.
There are personal limits and limits imposed by reality. Nobody escapes you. Denying this or the difficulties that appear in achieving our goals is an attitude that reflects an exaggerated narcissism. Why would reality give us a special place in his plans so that we can get what we want easily?
This narcissism doesn't mean appreciating yourself too much. Rather, it is appreciating oneself in the wrong way. Narcissism is looking from the outside and wanting to admire what you see. Self-love is the validation from within, of all that we are. Of the strengths and weaknesses. It is not related to how you see yourself from the outside, but to how you feel inside.
Learning to appreciate yourself is a path we should all take. It is not a trendy slogan. Much of our well-being comes from that feeling of self-approval. If personal appreciation is lacking, stop and reschedule the route.
