If you want to be successful, you have to stop repeating the same mistakes. Especially this.
“To do or not to do. There is no trying. "
Yoda teacher.
In recent weeks I have been torn apart by an atrocious doubt: to go and see the last episode of the saga of Twilight or review Star Wars?
The choice was very painful and took me for almost 0.02 very long seconds. But in the end I chose Star Wars and today's article was inspired by one of the most iconic characters: Yoda.
Andre… don't be witty! I'm part of the official Twilight fan club and if you talk badly, I'll send you 1.000 screaming girls with the naked Robert Pattinson poster under the house!
Ok, ok, I'll stop! But how touchy we are ... it's Monday morning huh ?!
Anyway, let's not get lost in useless feuds between sagas! Today we are here for something different. We're here to understand why, despite your best efforts and countless attempts, you fail to achieve that damn goal (yes, yes, you understand what I'm talking about).
To be successful it is not enough… to try
One of my favorite scenes from the entire Star Wars saga is the memorable sequence where the Yoda teacher is teaching the young man Skywalker to use the Force.
Up until that point, Luke had successfully used the Force to move small stones. But Master Yoda decides to give him an ambitious goal: to recover the space shuttle sunk in the swamp. Luke considers the undertaking impossible: it is one thing to lift a few stones, it is another thing to bring out a 'entire space shuttle! But Master Yoda explains to his young pupil that the difference is only in his mind.
Luke, not too convinced, decides to ... try it. Here is what wise Yoda replies:
How many times have you said to yourself "I'll try"?
Well ... that "I'll try" is the main mistake you are making in the pursuit of your goals. That "I'll try" is keeping you away from your goals. That "I'll try" is making you fail every time you try.
Saying to yourself “I'll try” means leaving the door open to the possibility of failure: you are so afraid of not making it that to allay the anxiety of failure you tell you the excuse of "I'll try". After all, if you fail, you can always tell yourself and others that ... you have tried. Quite right? Can anyone blame someone who tried? It would be like hitting someone with glasses!
Do you want to ... try too? Or have you finally decided that you want to achieve your goal?
If you are one who "tries", you can also stop reading this article: between us ... you tried, this is not for you, if you have not managed to reach your goal so far it was certainly not your fault (either never!) and the next paragraph will make no difference.
If on the contrary you are one who has the blades full of trying and failing, if you are one who has decided to change, but to really change, well… print the next sentences well in your mind.
Stop trying
Either you decide to do it or you decide not to do it. Point. There are no alternatives. Yes, well Andre: I know as soon as possible. Squeeze, squeeze, what am I supposed to do in practice ?! Here are some practical tips to fully experience Master Yoda's lesson:
- I decided. It is no coincidence that in the previous post I provided you with a template for to make decisions. If you really want to be successful, you must first decide what your goal is, without second thoughts, without hesitation, without backtracking. Make up your mind, take your time, and do it thoughtfully, but once you've made up your mind, make a 100% commitment to go this route. This also means "burning the ships behind you". Only when you are willing to give up all other alternatives for good, are you making concrete the only alternative left.
- Delete. You know the Curly's law? As long as you keep splitting between 1.000 goals, you are unlikely to achieve 1. Focus on 1 goal and eliminate everything else. Focus 100% on this goal. What is it you really want to achieve? Do you want to regain your ideal weight? Do you want to make money? Do you want to quit smoking? Do you want to graduate with 110 cum laude? What is that goal that will have the most significant impact on your life 5 years from now? What is it you really want? Devote your time, attention and resources to this goal and eliminate everything else… at least at first.
- Take action. To do or not to do. To do or not to do. To do or not to do. I want to repeat this phrase to you so that it remains well impressed in your mind. You either do one thing or you don't do it. Trying is equivalent to not doing. This means that every time you dedicate yourself to your goal you have to do it by applying the principles of deliberate practice. To get back in shape it is not enough to join the gym: you have to train every time as if you had Sergeant Hartman from “Full Metal Jacket” by your side. To change your financial condition, it's not enough to complain about the crisis and wait for someone to solve the problem for you: you have to work your way up like Tom Hanks in “Cast Away”. To pass your exams it is not enough to study from time to time while you wait for your best friend's answer on Facebook: you have to study with the same enthusiasm as the students of “L'Attimo Fuggente”.
I know I have been hard, at times unfriendly, in this article (experts call it assertiveness). It was a deliberate choice: fairy tales are for those who try. The harsh reality is for those who do.
Ps Hey… on Twilight of course I was joking: I really respect this sag (r) a! XD
Pps Can you imagine it if I had chosen Twilight ?! Today you would have found yourself with an article like: "Becoming a Vampire in 5 Easy Steps" or "The secret to having Kristen Stewart expressiveness". I know, I know ... you can't wait for them to be published ;-)
