Written and verified by the psychologist GetPersonalGrowth.
Last update: 15 November 2021
For many people, life as such makes little sense. Days acquire their meaning depending on the way we see things, the value we place on them and the impact we allow them to have on our lives. We could therefore say that it is us with our attitude to make sense of what happens around us.
Surely you will have come across people who are always on the defensive, who are always looking for a hidden meaning behind everything and who necessarily want to see the negative side of the coin. They have a closed, not very receptive and even immature attitude. Their world is little more than a dead end tunnel.
Reality only makes sense through our thoughts, affections and values. We create what we think about, therefore our attitude towards life and the way we allow things to influence us is essential.
Attitude and personality are always related. Yet while we have the ability to change the former and direct it towards a more open and positive perspective, our personality has much deeper roots, and no one can change it overnight.
We all live dark moments, our daily life always brings with it gray clouds that will not go away in a whisper. Sometimes, instead of fighting something, the only solution is to accept it and always maintain a positive and constructive attitude.
“Life always confronts us with gray days and black days, but just open the umbrella and wait for the rain to stop. There is no rush, and when you least expect it, the storm will go away and leave room for an even brighter day. "
Your attitude towards what happens to you
And you, how do you deal with what life puts you in front of? First of all we must point out that attitude is built through what we believe, but also thanks to our emotions. For this reason, at times, our reaction to certain events depends on our state of mind at that moment.
Always remember that you can control your attitude. The difference between a good day and a bad day doesn't depend on the clothes you wear or how others treat you. It depends on your attitude and on that implicit strength that makes you capable of dealing with everything.
Social psychology tells us that attitudes, in reality, are deeply linked to three dimensions that are worth reflecting on for a moment.
Cognitive dimension
How do you interpret what happens to you? How do you relate new experiences to previous ones?
If you have an appointment and the person you were supposed to see does not show up, you can, for example, blame yourself or the fact that you are always unlucky in love, your mother who told you that "you would never get married", etc. That is to say that it is our internal representations, our beliefs, and what we blame that create our negative attitude.
Affective dimension
When it comes to emotions and attitude, we can identify three different categories. There are people who, as you can guess, almost always show negative feelings towards their surroundings. The cause of this lies in some experiences that they have not managed adequately.
There are also people with a usually positive attitude. And finally, there are those who let themselves be carried away by what others think, do not take a stand, do not react and show themselves indifferent.
Behavioral dimension
In this case, it is interesting to observe that we all have a rather regular predisposition that leads us to react almost always in the same way in the face of situations. There are those who avoid responsibilities, those who take both their own and those of others… That is to say each of us, depending on his attitude, follows a certain behavioral pattern.
How to always maintain a positive attitude towards life
It is not easy and not even desirable to take a positive attitude every single day of our life. We all experience moments of despair, and it is not these that make us more or less strong. We are all human beings and therefore we are vulnerable. But never doubt it: it is in your vulnerability that your strength also resides.
Sometimes I don't cry because I'm weak, but because I'm tired of being strong. But it is only a matter of seconds and after having vented, I acquire the attitude of someone who can cope with everything again, because this is what life has taught me.
We have to work on our positive attitude every day. It is like a sail that must be kept taut if we want the wind to take us where we want, and for this we must maintain control over the three dimensions that we have pointed out to you: thoughts, emotions and our behavior. Always keep them present!
- Your emotional connotation is important: depending on the emotion you attribute to an experience, your attitude will be positive or negative. Example: that you have been rejected once does not have to lead you to change towards romantic relationships. A "no" does not diminish your value as a person; it should prompt you to look for someone who is more suitable for you.
- Be aware that you cannot control everything: as people, we have limits and we don't have control over everything around us, because the world cannot always turn the way we want. Example: given the current economic situation, you may have some difficulties, but you don't have to stop trusting your intuition, your country or the people around you. Begin to trust yourself, because society is made up of people, and you are part of it too. Be part of the change.
- Increase your self-love: if you don't believe in yourself, you don't value yourself and you don't understand that you have every right to make mistakes and learn to be happy, no one will do it for you. You are the masters of your destiny and your attitude is the compass that will allow you to climb mountains. But all of this will only happen if you allow it to yourself and, above all, if you really believe it.
