Last update: May 04, 2022
Human beings are social animals, which means they need others to live happily. But to what extent? What line distinguishes a healthy bond from emotional addiction? How to overcome emotional addiction?
Contact with others is essential for human development. Children need a figure who provides them not only with food, but also with warmth and affection. This continues into adulthood, as to have a full life we ​​need solid social bonds: family, friends, partners.
However, we must be careful: one thing is the need for social contact, in general, another the specific relationships in which we embark and how we live them.
What is emotional addiction?
SEspecially in the sentimental field, emotional dependence comes into play. In these cases the relationship, far from being a support, becomes an obstacle for the development and also for the mental health of the members of the couple.
It is possible that thea relationship does not make you happy because you have lived it from a position of dependence. In the following lines we describe some signs that indicate a possible dependence on the sentimental partner.
- If the relationship causes suffering (anxiety or sadness) and yet you are unable to change course or put an end to it, most likely you are dependent on it. Relationships are complicated and certainly require effort, but that doesn't mean you have to suffer.
- No activities outside the relationship. Hobbies, study, work, friends… If you do everything with your partner, the relationship is based on emotional dependence.
- Inability to be alone. We may be so used to sharing everything with your partner that you don't know what to do alone or be overwhelmed with worry about what your partner is doing without us or that something bad might happen.
- Thoughts or convictions that you cannot live without your partner or that life would be meaningless. These ideas reflect a dependent relationship.
- Jealousy is usually another good indicator of emotional dependence, as related to insecurity and lack of communication.
Causes of emotional dependence
In some cases, emotional dependence is due to poor learning. In other words, we have not learned or been taught to tolerate the suffering inherent in life.
And, therefore, we are unable to abandon partners who hurt us for fear of change or loneliness.
In other cases, it is due to a problem of self-esteem, or when the idea we have of ourselves depends on what others think. We are fine if others appreciate us, love us, encourage us, but not alone.
If we have such low self-esteem, we will depend on the partner to find the security that we do not have.
Whatever the reason, partner addiction is always a problem for both of them, in fact both suffer. It follows, therefore, that it will be necessary to work both in pairs and individually.
Don't let your partner take up your whole being and mind in such a way that there is no room for you. Love is not about disappearing.
(Walter Laughs)
How to overcome emotional addiction?
Given the sometimes devastating consequences of a relationship in which the partner becomes all their way, it is important to know and implement some strategies to overcome emotional addiction.
- Be honest with yourself and try to trace the cause of the addiction. Perhaps she is afraid of loneliness, because it has never been faced. Or perhaps self-esteem depends on the compliments of the partner ... Let's think, because once the cause has been identified, we can start the necessary changes to get better.
- Reconcile with loneliness. Finding spaces in which to be yourself without your partner and, above all, to benefit from it: doing yoga, joining a group of hikers, signing up for a photography course ... Surely there is something that piques your curiosity or that you always are. desired to do. The important thing is to engage in an activity that does not include the partner.
- Be aware of negative thoughts, especially jealousy, fears, etc., and try to be stronger than them. When we notice that we are on the verge of falling into a spiral of negative thoughts, we go for a walk, call a friend, etc.
- Talk to your partner. Communication is a fundamental pillar in a relationship. It is about sharing your feelings so that you are aware of the changes you intend to make. That way he can offer support and understanding.
- Consider the possibility of a professional help if you don't overcome the emotional addiction on your own it seems impossible.
Conclusions
Life is a path to learning and when we let go of the ballast and with it we lose fears and anxieties, we enjoy the ride and everything that is part of it, especially relationships.
Do you think you are or have been dependent on your partner? If so, how did you succeed or how do you think you can overcome the emotional addiction? Have you consulted a professional?
