Impatience is a completely useless feeling. It wears us out, hurts us and often leads to mistakes. What can we do to prevent it from harming us?
Last update: October 07, 2020
Impatience is a state that borders on anxiety dangerously. We have all become less patient, it is no secret to anyone. The accelerated pace of today's society has accustomed us to live faster, making us more and more intolerant to expectations. In this whirlwind, how can we stop being impatient?
This tendency to impatience is a real shame. Much of what has real value and meaning takes time to build. As a rule, fast results are even the most ephemeral ones and you cannot move the clock forward in situations that require gradual progression. In these cases, being impatient results in self-destruction.
In summary, impatience is configured as an emotional lack of synchronization with the rhythm of life. If something does not proceed as fast as we want, it is not a problem of reality, but a consequence of our poor adaptation.
So how do you get over that stinging feeling of not being able to wait? In this article we propose some tips to stop being impatient and enjoy life more.
"Hope ceases to be happiness when it is accompanied by impatience."
-John Ruskin-
Stop being impatient in 3 simple steps
1. Identifying true needs makes you less impatient
We rarely pause to analyze what lies behind impatience. We may have the perception that life flows at a different speed than we are used to; and when this pace slows down, we begin to feel a friction that causes us discomfort. This is the generally accepted explanation.
But often there is something else behind the impatience. If we really want something to happen or not, maybe it's because we can't face the present; with what is missing or what remains. And that's why we want to escape, and impatience is nothing more than the manifestation of the impossibility of doing so.
In these cases, the problem does not lie in what has not yet occurred or in what has not yet finished, but in the difficulty in adapting to a present that is probably not among the most pleasant. However, this present is what it is, what there is. Before thinking about how to get rid of it, we should perhaps reflect on how to find a place within this dimension.
2. Deconstruct the desire
It is never easy to understand what desire lies behind impatience. At first glance, it may simply be a desire to get over a situation that causes suffering, lack, or discomfort. Nobody likes to stay in these states for long, which is why impatience arises when no changes occur.
Even in this case, however, something similar to what has just been illustrated happens: not accepting the reality that one is experiencing does not necessarily have to find a solution by resisting or waiting for it to change. The smartest thing to do is work to change it, to the extent that it can be changed in the present moment.
For things to happen, it is not enough to desire them. And if they don't, it's not enough to resist it. In both cases, the effort is useless, but it is still an effort. We always have a certain margin of action and it is precisely to it that we must cling to in order to stop being impatient.
3. Meditation to stop being impatient
Meditation is a practice that helps calm the mind. The state of calm makes it easier to turn your attention to what is happening inside you and to understand it better. It becomes easier to know, for example, if we really want something to happen or end, or rather if we want to escape from that part of us that cannot cope with the situation.
Through meditation we can gain control of our thoughts, gaining greater adaptability. On the other hand, if we let ourselves be carried away by impatience, everything becomes difficult. In fact, impatience can delay or prevent you from getting what you want.
Patience, like so many other virtues, is not included in our personal baggage. It is a quality that must be cultivated within oneself with practice, over time. Difficult situations are the ideal ground for this virtue to flourish.
Performing concentration and meditation exercises can be of great help, and they also help us understand the uselessness of impatience. “To those who know how to wait, time opens every door”. And it is true. Everything has its time, which often does not depend on our desires and / or needs.
