The false peace of the comfort zone depends on self-deception. It makes us think that if we do not expose ourselves to the new and uncertainty, we will feel calmer. However, by doing so we will be prisoners of our fears.
Last update: January 04, 2021
The comfort zone is formed by all those circumstances to which we passively adapt and which, therefore, exert a certain influence on us. On the surface this gives us peace of mind, but it is a false peace because life is dynamic and sooner or later we will have to face change, no matter how much we resist.
The comfort zone is not the ideal space in which to develop the ability to adapt to the new. Indeed, it is just the opposite. The more we settle into routine and move only into the realm of the known, the harder it will be to anticipate and cope with changes.
That is why it is said that a false peace reigns in the comfort zone. It is not the tranquility of those who have self-confidence, but that of those who have the illusion of controlling everything. As we move away from the comfort zone, this false peace disappears and becomes insecurity and distress. The tranquility in that case does not depend on the person, but on the stability of the circumstances: this is why it is so fragile.
“The only way to discover the limits of the possible is to venture a little further, towards the impossible”.
-Arthur Clarke-
The relationship between the comfort zone and fear
One of the most troubling aspects of the comfort zone is that it is built around fear. When a person faces circumstances and people who are familiar to them, they feel secure. The aim is to minimize uncertainty and this is why we tend to delimit a subjective territory from which we do not want to leave.
The comfort zone is primarily defined by fear, the fear of change. Everything outside the known territory is experienced as a threat. The new, the different, the unknown is considered threatening for those who live their life in this way. The false peace you feel ceases to exist when something unexpected happens.
Because of this latent fear, many define the comfort zone as a dangerous zone because those who settle there become increasingly vulnerable. Your safety and peace of mind depends solely on external factors, which can change at any time.
A false peace that has a price
In addition to what has been said so far, those who remain in their comfort zone he doesn't feel completely safe there either, even if no change occurs. His total dependence on certain circumstances often causes deep anxiety and false beliefs.
While being safe, the person fantasizes about the possible risks that could arise. This causes anguish and puts an end to the false peace that should prevail.
When someone is opposed to crossing the border of the comfort zone, they have to pay a heavy price. The most common example is that of the employee who hates his job, but doesn't give it up for the world. It's not easy to do a job you don't like, but fear of facing the unknown and uncertainty are sometimes sources of further distress.
Those who remain in the comfort zone are no longer calm, nor happier. Simply create a hiding place to face the fear. With this she does not resolve her insecurities, on the contrary it exacerbates them.
The only way to overcome fears is to get out of the comfort zone
The only way to overcome fears is to face them, we all know that, even if sometimes we try to ignore them. Looking fear in the face is never pleasant, it leads us to our limits and causes quite pleasant sensations. Let us experience fear, for a moment, at its greatest intensity.
After all, staying in the comfort zone is a way of declaring that we feel unable to deal with many dynamics. It is true that we are not able to do everything, we are not immortal nor can we avoid suffering. Nonetheless, we can find our balance.
When we trust ourselves in a reasonable way, fears recover their true dimensions. A sense of tranquility pervades us that is not the same as the false peace of the comfort zone, but to better expectations regarding our person. This trust is needed to transform our life rather than barricade us in a corner that protects us, yes, but that imprisons us.
