Last update: July 05, 2016
The feeling of peace you feel right now indicates that you have made the right choice. Maybe someone will find it a poor choice, others not very logical. In fact, perhaps it wasn't even the best choice. However, it is clear that it is what made you happy, which allowed you to combine your values, your feelings, your ego ...
Sigmund Freud said that making a decision is like riding a racehorse. The animal represents our emotional, instinctive, almost unbridled side. On the other hand, the rider is the one who holds the reins of reason, the one who guides, who brakes and directs the horse. Well, in most cases, when the time comes to make a decision, the part of us linked to the fascinating world of emotions wins. This is the terrain on which dozens and dozens of races take place every day ...
You are not anyone's choice. You are your own priority; therefore, when it is time to make a decision, listen to your heart. Because there is no right way, there is a way that makes you happy.
Life is a constant choice, we spend most of our time dedicating ourselves to the art of making decisions: coffee or tea, elevator or stairs, call him / her or not call him / her, take the train or let it pass ... Sometimes, deciding involves the exact same sensations as a leap into the void. One thing is certain, we need to arm ourselves with large doses of courage and responsibility.
We invite you to reflect on this.
There is no correct choice: there is the will to be happy
Henry James wrote an exceptional short story entitled "The Merry Corner", in which he presents the character of Spencer Brydon, a young man who, after having achieved success and fortune in the United States, returns to his birthplace in England.
In the solitude of his now empty house, he wonders if he did well, if the decision to leave his roots and his family was the correct choice. In the midst of his existential doubt, his alter ego suddenly appears, that other "I" that reveals to him, little by little, what would have become of him if he had chosen to stay.
The doubt about having made the right decision or not accompanies us throughout our life. Well, just as Henry James teaches us in his story, making a decision is part of a process that starts from the heart first, but which is destined to leave room for responsibility. From emotions we therefore pass to reason, driven, above all, by the need to become the architects of their own path.
There are not always right or wrong choices, and even fewer roads illuminated by the light of happiness. The wisest decision will always be the one that will give us peace, the one that will go hand in hand with our conscience and which, in turn, will incite us to continue making decisions consistent with our essence.
A desire changes nothing, but a decision begins everything.
The amygdaloid body manages hundreds of connections throughout the brain and consists of a refined and fascinating structure that acts as a sentinel capable of evaluating any conscious or unconscious stimulus, thought, experience or event. After analyzing an impulse, the amygdala makes a judgment, a decision that will later be scrutinized by our frontal cortex.
Considering that many of our decisions are made following the path of emotions, let's find out together how to do so that they are a little wiser, more appropriate and responsible.
The keys to making the right decisions
To be happy, you need to make decisions and know how to overcome the boundary with fear. It is not at all easy to do this, we know, because deciding also involves leaving many things behind.
- When our heart prompts us to take that step, but fear occurs, we need to rationalize that fear and understand it. Moving from emotion to reason, since only logic and conscious thinking can push us, with courage, to break down the walls of fear.
- When your emotions lead you to take a certain path, ask yourself if you are acting realistically. It is a question that must be asked of oneself and no one else. If it seems feasible to you, if it makes you happy and it is possible, do not allow anything or anyone to stop you.
- Accept the possibility of failure. Accept and internalize the possibility that things are not going the right way, but try to understand that, at the same time, one option is not enough to find the path to happiness. It is just a door that will show you many other paths.
The art of being happy lies in knowing how to decide every day with consistency and listening to one's heart, accepting the errors of the path and discovering one's own vital paths, one's inner peace.
