Do you know those adjectives that others choose to describe us? They are the labels. Today we will talk about their characteristics and the effects they can have on us.
Last update: December 28, 2019
Labels are the most immediate and common way we have to get an idea of the nature of what we have in front of us, moreover at first sight. In this perspective, they are very useful tools. But labeling people or self-labeling means attaching a category and characteristics that can be very negative, regardless of their veracity.
In some circumstances they can help, but in most cases they just categorize briefly. Thus, characteristics are attributed that probably do not correspond to the truth, even if they can be considered as such only because they are associated with certain labels.
Labels and self-knowledge
Despite the need to assign names to categorize behaviors, keep in mind that labels do box. They are based on stereotypes and usually lead us to adopt a role that in many cases does not belong to a person. “Lazy”, “bad influence”, “slow”, etc., are some of the many labels that can be imposed.
Many of them are soon attributed. They hurt in childhood, but it is during adolescence that this phenomenon can significantly undermine growthor. Very often, moreover, they are the result of the projections and failures of parents and educators. The latter project their weaknesses in this way, but also the fact of not knowing the children and not being able to face the difficult stages of their growth.
The result is that some people can internalize these labels and behave "as expected of them", even outside the environment in which they were attached, attributing to themselves characteristics that they have awakened in them attitudes that are actually foreign to them. Such behaviors, especially the most negative ones, heavily affect self-esteem, self-knowledge and motivation.
The power of words
Labels can lead to assume certain roles and internalize them as one's own despite having nothing or little to do with the reality of the facts. Even when they are positive they can generate a certain amount of stress and anxiety about the expectations they carry with them. We make judgments and attribute a range of characteristics to others because doing so, in many cases, makes our life easier. But these labels, in many cases, are just that: subjective judgments and opinions, based on unstable foundations.
Labels shape us as people. Probably a moment of fragility will have happened to everyone without however feeling defined by that weakness. Well, the labels go in the opposite direction, because they "stick" to being. They identify a person as selfish or generous, intelligent or stupid even when being more or less intelligent, more or less generous, most of the time depends on the circumstances and the generosity of the eyes that judge us.
We imagine the opposite when they label us strong people. A positive, desirable label at first. Yet, be careful, because it can lead us to judge ourselves or others in a moment of fragility. To label ourselves as strong people means, in part, to deprive ourselves of those moments and force us to show ourselves strong under any circumstances. This involves a responsibility and expectations on the part of ourselves and others that are difficult to meet.
Rethink labels
The mechanism of Revising and passing the labels requires some inner work which passes through the recognition of those attributions that hurt us or that no longer serve us. It requires an analysis of the concept of self, in search of those characteristics we bear the weight of and which almost do not correspond to reality. On the other hand, in case they are true, very often it is easier to change the reality rather than the labels. One thing that always remains a trace ...
This mechanism also passes through the elaboration of statements contrary to labels and the rethinking of our behaviors. All this to verify if our renewed predisposition is suitable for the configuration to which we aspire, which does not include what we have decided to throw away, but what, instead, we have decided to make ours. Do you have the courage to embark on this journey?
