The matrix of habits

That is how to distinguish between good and bad habits and how to create good habits more effectively.

“We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence, therefore, is not an act, but a habit. "

Aristotle.

 

I recently rediscovered one of my favorite personal growth authors: Anthony robbins, writer of best-sellers such as "How to Get the Best of Yourself and Others" or "How to Improve Your Mental, Physical, Financial State".

Tony Robbins he is the classic motivational "guru", a figure that creates many allergies in me, but if one is willing to put aside prejudices and read and listen to Tony's advice with an open mind, our life can be literally revolutionized.

I want to take advantage of this article to tell you about the matrix of habits: a simple tool, learned through listening to Tony Robbins' audiobooks, which can prove particularly useful for understanding what the habits that dictate our lifestyle e how to improve them.

Since I don't like to assimilate any motivational shit without reworking it in my own way, the matrix of habits I'm going to tell you about takes its cue from the article "The difference between pleasure and happiness" and moves a little away from the one proposed by Tony Robbins, even if the underlying message does not change:

The matrix of habits

Every habit, whether it's going for a run in the morning or smoking cigarettes, can be classified on the basis of two variables: experience e happiness. In fact, any habit makes us feel more or less good immediately (pleasure) and does us more or less good in the long run (happiness).

By classifying habits based on pleasure and happiness it is possible to identify 4 classes of habits:

Class 1 habits

These are the best habits ever. It is those habits that they make us feel good, they give us pleasure; but not only that, they are also healthy habits, or habits that will improve the quality of our life in the long run, that is, they will give us happiness.

Some examples of class 1 habits? Practicing a sport we love, studying a subject we are passionate about, keeping a personal diary, etc.

Class 2 habits

I've often talked about class 2 habits within the GetPersonalGrowth Blog. Class 2 habits are all those habits that they will make us happy in the long run, but which cost us effort and self-discipline to be established immediately.

I am an example ... waking up early in the morning, eating healthy, adopting an effective study method, etc.

Class 1 habits e 2 class they are what we can consider "good habits": some are pleasant, others less, but both help us find true happiness in our life.

Class 3 habits

Here we are with bad habits ...

Class 3 habits are those habits that give us pleasure, too much, but they destroy our life in the long run, that is, they make us unhappy.

Here the examples are self-evident: drugs, alcohol, excesses at the table, etc.

Class 3 habits are by far the most difficult to eradicate. In fact, even if we are aware of the possible damage in the long run, we are not willing to give up these immediate pleasures.

Class 4 habits

Finally there are the habits of class 4, or those experiences that they don't give us pleasure and that hurt us in the long run.

An example of this are the first contacts with smoking (raise your hand if you have not coughed inhaling your first cigarette) and in general all those experiences in which, in order to be accepted by others, we are forced to do something we know is unpleasant and wrong.

Moral of the story ...

So let me understand how things stand… to be happy, I should give up all the pleasures of life and become some kind of Tibetan monk ?!

The matrix of habits can help us understand 2 very important things:

1. create new healthy habits, willpower is important, but it is a limited resource; to have lasting and effective changes, we must learn to transform class 2 habits (they are good for us, but they are unpleasant), into class 1 habits (they are good and pleasant). An example? If you get hives just thinking about going for a run in the morning, look for ways to make this experience enjoyable: listen to your favorite pieces of music, find a partner to train, etc.
2. If, using the matrix of habits, you find that most of your habits are class 3 (they are pleasant, but they hurt you) or class 4 (they are unpleasant and they hurt you), perhaps the time has come to reflect on your lifestyle and on what your convictions are. Are you absolutely certain that the only pleasures in life must be destructive? The choices you make, do you make them with your own head or with that of your friends? Are you willing to give up what you believe in to be socially accepted? Thinking outside the box can be one of the most important milestones of your personal growth path.

And you? How did you turn class 2 habits into class 1 habits? How did you give up on class 3 and 4 habits? Let me know in the comments. Thanks.