Last update: 26 November 2015
"The silence of the envious makes a lot of noise"
-Hermann Hesse-
“His silence really makes me uncomfortable. When he is next to me he says nothing, but looking at his face I understand that he cannot see the affection and esteem that others give me.
When I talk about my smallest goals achieved, I notice that he is not happy about it, indeed he lives it badly. Other times she tries to pretend great joy for my goals, but I know he doesn't really feel it.
I would like not to notice all this, because I suffer for him. When we are among friends and he is there too, I just want to escape.
If only he could see things from another point of view. If you could understand that if they respect me and if I reach my little ones triumphs, this does not lead to an improvement or worsening of his state. It doesn't mean they can't love him too. I think he should learn to be happy with what he has and who he is.
I feel sorry for him because he does not realize that he does nothing but harm himself. Because in the end, I'm happy with what I have and what I don't have. I do not compare myself with anyone and continue on my way. I know there are more beautiful people than me, richer people ... But who cares! I am me and I feel good. I don't envy or desire what others have.
But he doesn't see things the way I do, he does nothing but ask questions about others, ending up torturing himself. I wish I could help him, but he can't even stand to see me.
Maybe one day, as the years go by, he will be able to reflect on this aspect of his personality and work on it a bit. Even just to feel better about yourself and evolve and improve as a person.
I believe that I will try to distance myself little by little, without realizing it. Our relationships are extremely toxic and they overwhelm me, especially when we are together with others. I have to continually measure my words so as not to hurt him, sacrificing my well-being ... And this is also negative for me.
I think he should feel more confident about himself. Don't compare yourself to anyone else. "
Clues to recognize an envious
- They look down on you. He must not miss even the smallest detail of how you are dressed, how you behave, etc.
- They always go behind other people.
- They tend to criticize and judge.
- They ridicule others often and willingly.
- They are never satisfied with anything and they are not satisfied with anything. They are convinced that others are the lucky ones who get everything they want.
- They are not creative peopleindeed they tend to copy others.
- They are happy with the failures others.
How to behave in the face of an envious person?
"Envy is a declaration of inferiority"
-Napoleon-
There will always be an envious person next to you: in your group of friends, in the workplace, among neighbors or even within your family. Do not be infected by their negativity, do not allow them to make you feel bad.
- Whether it is a neighbor or an acquaintance: don't take it into consideration and don't let it affect your life. If you can walk away from him with your head down, even better. There is no need to argue with him or get angry, you would get nothing.
- If you are a work colleague: make sure you maintain a good working relationship, but nothing else. Surround yourself with colleagues who make you feel good and appreciate you. Don't tell them your private stuff.
- If you are in a group of friends or family: if you get along well with the group of friends, don't leave it because of one person alone. Keep enjoying the rest of the company, seeking within you to pity him.
In general, try to become aware of what is happening, without taking anything personally and not letting yourself be influenced by the feelings of envy of others.
