Last update: 31 March, 2016
Time is united and merged with the experiences we have over the course of life, so both allow us to learn, know, change. In fact, we are so tied to time that this seems to expand or shorten according to our mood and our expectations.
Time does not pass in vain, especially if we think about how we were 10 years ago, but also 5 months ago or 3 weeks ago. There is nothing more relative than the years. We have a tendency to measure time through important events that have marked us and that we will always remember.
“A man must live in the present. What does it matter who you were last week, if you know who you are today? "
(Paul Auster)
Living means having experiences and experiences mark time
Every emotion that arises from direct contact with reality implies a change: we can travel and learn about new models of life, meet people with ideas and habits that we did not know, form a family, lose people we believed would be there forever, find love, but also lack of love, etc. All these facts will change us without us realizing it.
What is certain is that living has a price, including that of living experiences and tying them to the time of our life. There will be moments that will mark us so much that we will believe them longer than they actually are, and others that will seem fleeting to us. This is why it is said that time changes us.
Usually, we blame our physical or personality changes on particularly negative or positive experiences we have had. Extremes always make a difference: we will never forget pure happiness, but neither will our falls and failures.
Don't resist change
It is evident that, in situations where we live extreme emotional experiences, we change, because these force us to touch the deepest part of ourselves and to see each other as we have never seen each other before. At that point, we know aspects and values ​​that we ignored, feelings that we had never experienced before, and the need arises in us to order our inner chaos.
“When we are unable to change a situation, we face the challenge of changing ourselves”.
(Victor Frankl)
If we go through a bad moment, it is likely that we will come out stronger: if we are wrong, we will know what we should not repeat next time; if something has made us happy, we will look for what makes us feel good and we will shun sadness.
What is certain is that we will never be the same after a new experience or after years have passed: time will transform us and shape our person.
In fact, resisting change is useless. Wanting to deny that something has happened in our life and convincing ourselves that everything is as before is useless, because that is not the reality. Everything flows and everything remains, which means that our existence will continue to function the same, but we will not be the same.
The secret is knowing how to adapt and accept
If we can't resist change, the only way to grow positively as a person is to accept it and renew ourselves. If, for some reason, we can no longer stay true to our principles, we will have to create new ones to help us start over. It is good to understand that time flies and that only we can decide what to do with it and how to use it.
Just as time changes our person, so does the individuals around us and, consequently, it affects the relationships we maintain.
It is essential to understand that accepting your own change is just as important as accepting the change of others, as long as this does not damage us directly; in this circumstance, the other person is likely to need our adaptation as well.
“Why are we afraid of change? All life is a change, why fear it? "
(George Helbert)
Images courtesy of Claudia Tremblay and Pascal Campion
