Last update: February 13, 2016
Have you ever been jealous in your life? Maybe yes. Jealousy is the fear of losing someone, even if this feeling involves three people.
First of all, we are inside jealousy, then there is the person we are afraid of losing and, finally, the person who wants to take away our loved ones enters the scene.
Jealousy destroys relationships, because it leads to a lack of trust, but there is more. Feeling extreme jealousy denotes great self-insecurity.
Today we will talk about jealousy in order to understand this emotion and turn it into self-esteem. A self-esteem that, in jealous people, is very low.
Is my jealousy motivated?
Very often, people who are jealous think that their partner has no reason to be jealous. But if there is no reason, how is it possible that you feel jealous?
People with jealousy have far more reasons to experience it than it seems, even if that doesn't justify the emotion itself..
First, jealous people have low self-esteem and think that any other person, real or imagined, is better.
They are very insecure and believe they feel better if they have total control over the other person. This can especially happen when the person was previously unfaithful and you feel insecure about your partner, you are afraid that they will do the same thing.
Sometimes the jealous person is hiding behind something that doesn't really exist. This is the result of the exaggeration caused by the imagination, which is precisely not real.
In reality, the jealous person behaves this way because he is anxious at the thought of a possible betrayal. When he tries to avoid this anxiety, fear appears which is strengthened more and more until it turns into jealousy.
What needs to be done? To think about where this insecurity comes from and to put aside the anxiety of the control over the other person. Only in this way will you be able to live happily and free from jealousy.
Trust yourself, boost self-esteem
If you want to stop being jealous or want to help someone not be jealous anymore, the first thing to do is to strengthen self-esteem.
Be more confident, think about yourself and work on your fears. They have an origin, you have to understand where insecurity comes from and eliminate it.
Think, for example, how much it bothers you to have others look at your partner. Why are you angry when you should be proud of it?
People can look at your partner, satisfy their sight, but your partner is yours alone by his choice. Why do you think someone can take it away from you?
As you begin to trust your partner and feel more confident, you will also begin to see things more clearly and calmly. Isn't it true that you now feel more relieved than before when you wanted to exercise control over everything?
Nobody owns anyone. We are all free and this does not mean that our partner is leaving with another person.
There is more, if you have previously been unfaithful and your jealousy depends on it, that is, you fear that your partner is cheating on you, put yourself in his shoes.
You have already made the mistake, you do not understand that anyone can make a mistake? How can you condemn and judge something that you yourself have done? You have to be consistent.
It can also happen that you feel jealous precisely because the person you love so much has been unfaithful to you. In this case, you no longer trust this person. If you are unable to forgive infidelity, you must be aware that the relationship cannot continue. Sooner or later it will break.
Are you jealous people? If so and you want to solve this problem, then look for the reason for the jealousy you feel. If you can't find a solution, you may not be with the right person for you.
If jealousy torments you, your relationship with that person can never be healthy. Think about yourself and how confident you want to feel. Strengthen your self-esteem and have confidence in yourself.
Sometimes the person we are jealous of exists only in our imagination ...
