Last update: Augusts 19, 2015
Today I leave you free. Today I forget about my fears. Today I begin to like myself. Today I go on. Today I stop expecting you.
Usually, we become aware of the emotional bondage to which we are subjected when our heart breaks. This happens when a relationship hurts us, because it suffocates us or because something inside of us is broken when it is time to say goodbye.
Right before this happens, we feel that the whole world shuts down and that an immense wave of pain envelops us, preventing us from breathing. This is emotional suffocation and its main ingredient is emotional addiction.
It happens that we have to let go of what we held close to us and start a new life, because emotional slavery suffocates. That is the moment when we do not see ourselves able to do anything if we are not accompanied by someone to guide us.
Enjoying your loneliness to have happy relationships
“All my life I have thought of love as a kind of accepted slavery. In reality this is not the case: freedom exists only if love exists. He who lets himself go and feels free loves to the fullest.
And the one who loves the most feels free. But in love, each of us is responsible for what he feels and you can't blame someone else for it.
Nobody loses anyone, because nobody owns anyone.
And this is the true experience of freedom: having the most important thing in the world without owning it "
Undici Minuti – Paulo Coelho
The best way to be happy with someone is to learn to be happy with yourself, because only in this way will the company be a choice and not a necessity.
Love is often misunderstood: the representative phrase must not be "I need your presence in my life", but rather "I choose your presence in my life". Avoiding feelings of need and possession will help us live in peace and freedom with ourselves.
Stop waiting: emotional release
"I'm sick and probably worse, but I'm learning to be alone and that's a big plus and a small triumph."
Frida Kahlo
Your true freedom begins when you begin to understand who you are and what you are capable of. When you begin to untie yourself and get rid of your chains, you get the hard-earned trophy: independence, the one who will keep you going without having to hold someone's hand.
The best possible experience of freedom is to possess no one and not be possessed by anyone. Because feeling that you have someone, after all, means living with slavery.
Our addiction makes us slaves, especially if our self-esteem depends on someone or something. Needing compliments, affection or attention deprives us of the ability to decide our destiny.
It is not others who harm you, it is you who make mistakes when you give too much weight to their opinions and actions. No one can hurt you without permission from your inner "I", which is the basis of your "emotional scaffold".
Take care of your own self-esteem is the best way to say goodbye to harmful and futile attachments, which affect your vitality and your desire for fulfillment.
You have to be the first to enforce yourself and forget the concepts that you can only be loved if someone has you and, in return, you pining for your partner.
Main image courtesy of AJ Css
