Last update: April 11, 2016
Have you ever wondered what emotional intelligence is and how it affects your everyday life? Maybe we give too much importance to our intellect and the use of logic, and not enough to emotions.
No doubt, emotions are vital to our development. In addition to creating an entire structure of thought, emotional intelligence can form real behavior patterns that can define the way a person behaves.
What is emotional intelligence?
If we refer strictly to the definition of emotional intelligence, we must mention Mayer, who was the first to conduct studies on it.
Mayer defines emotional intelligence as the human ability to perceive, understand and regulate one's own emotions and those of those around us. This causes an intellectual and emotional growth that is useful for transforming our behavior and our thoughts.
"The greatest discovery of my generation is that human beings can change their lives by changing their mental habits" -William James-
The importance of emotions
If you think about the power of emotions as generators of change, given that directly affect behavior and thinking, it is obvious that they play a fundamental role in the formation of personality.
At this point, it is interesting to observe certain important factors that indicate the need to be able to rely on a healthy, sincere and well-developed emotional intelligence.
Don't forget that repressing emotions is a very bad sign for our mental health. In this case, we will transform our intellect in an artificial way, based on impositions and not on natural necessities.
To observe
People who observe and are fascinated by what happens to others, especially loved ones or close ones, show healthy emotional intelligence.
If you are an observer, you will find that every day you could improve or motivate positive change in the world of others. In this way, you will also find motivation for yourself. Body language, tics, or human behavior itself can be a source of wealth for you.
"True compassion is not just feeling another person's pain, but also being motivated to eliminate it."
-Daniel Goleman-
Be an example
If you give advice to others, why don't you follow it too? A very important part of emotional intelligence is knowing how to lead by example.
In this case, you will not only have to find solutions that help others, but also know how to apply them to yourself. If you believe that something can be good for others, it probably will be good for you too.
Be aware of yourself
An important aspect of emotional intelligence is that it allows you to be aware of yourself. No one is perfect, we have weaknesses and strengths to live with. Without a doubt, there is no reason why we cannot fight against our weaknesses day after day and strengthen the attitudes on which we feel stronger.
Leave the past behind and live in the present
A person who has developed healthy and efficient emotional intelligence knows that the past lags behind. You don't have to live in it, because it won't come back. We must learn from what happened, apply it to the present to improve as people, and look to the future without fear and with hope.
Be a good listener
Another advantage of people with great emotional intelligence is that they know how to listen. They are active listeners, learning from others what seems useful and advantageous to them. They will use this knowledge about themselves to be richer and more complete.
Be comfortable with others
A very positive and important aspect of the human beings with good emotional intelligence is that they feel comfortable with others. Whether with strangers or friends, they are confident in themselves and their emotions; for this reason, they have no problem dealing with meeting people of other races, cultures or sexual orientation.
The use of ethics
People with good emotional intelligence are aware of the importance of ethics in all their actions. Whether it's work or family relationships, they follow standards of behavior that allow them to separate good from bad.
It is evident that emotional intelligence, given the importance it plays in human emotions, is a skill that allows us to know ourselves better and to be richer and more complete in all aspects of our life.