Written and verified by the psychologist GetPersonalGrowth.
Last update: 15 November 2021
Living with a broken heart means walking naked, with the half-empty soul tied to a rope that still belongs to another person. It is a slow torture that suffocates and wounds; however, no pain is eternal.
They say that time heals the absence of love, offenses and disappointments. But it will not be only the passing of days that will help us: our courage and our inner strength will also guide us little by little. to reduce the pain of wounds. And, even if oblivion does not exist, at least we will have peace.
Living with a broken heart is not lethal, but there are many particles within us that die. Nobody deserves eternal suffering; a breath of fresh air must be found from which to start living again by finding oneself again.
The emotional wound caused by an impossible love or a finished love is undoubtedly among the most traumatic that the human being can experience.
We remain paralyzed, because our values ​​collapse, because hopes disappear, because we have to collect our self-esteem piece by piece, as it has been shattered. The wound healing process is slow and delicate.
A broken heart must be mended with gold
A broken bone often takes much less time to heal than a broken heart. To heal any kind of wound, it takes willpower and, above all, the ability to accept that we will never be the same; that we will emerge strengthened from this process, that we will be resilient and that we will gain a lesson from this experience.
In Japan, there is a very ancient art called Kintsukuroi; it consists in repairing broken objects with gold, because beauty also lies in the wounds healed. The final result tells the story of the fragments, now unique.
The Kintsukuroi tradition shows us a type of philosophy that invites us to reflect on various aspects:
- If we avoid accepting a loss, a disappointment, a rejection or a separation, we will remain anchored in an eternal and useless suffering.
- It is important to accept the events and the fact that we are not well. Recognizing pain means accepting a reality that we have to work on day by day.
- Pain is part of us, but it does not represent us. We must understand that this is a temporary situation.
- Don't make the mistake of wanting to go back to the past. Now you are no longer the same, many things have changed within you and this is not necessarily a bad thing.
- The art of Kintsukuroi has as its purpose the exhibition of fractures, the breaking of pieces of porcelain. The magic lies in repairing them with gold to highlight the wound and obtain an indisputable beauty result.
- According to tradition, objects repaired with the Kintsukuroi technique will never break again.
Put aside what you hear
We know that a broken heart cannot be mended with gold, but with the intense glow of your emotions as they struggle to ignite new hope., to heal lost dreams and awaken with other more intense desires, with deeper roots.
Sometimes, you are so strong that you come to love, even with a broken heart, people who do not deserve it. Don't allow it: put aside what you feel and remember what you deserve. Remember that love is joy and not suffering.
In reality, this is not an easy process. Emerging from the tears and ashes of a life that we dreamed of and that we have not achieved is not easy, but, however hard it may be, it is not impossible. On the contrary: There will come a time when you will be proud of yourself for becoming the person you really wanted to be, people free from suffering.
Remember what you deserve
People who walk every day with a broken heart have forgotten what they deserve. It is appropriate that the "gold" with which you will mend the fractures of your broken soul is composed of these simple principles:
- You deserve to be loved and happy. Nobody has to live under the sentence of feeling unlucky every day of their life.
- The choice made by a person at a given moment does not define you. It is not you. It is the thought of him, of his micro-world; it is a foreign universe in which you do not have to collapse. Your reality is unique and different from that of the one who broke your heart.
- No one but you will be able to get you out of this situation. You must be skilled craftsmen who mend their wounds with the gold of your self-esteem, of your renewed hopes, of new dreams to embark on.
Broken hearts are boats adrift that, for some time, advance in disorientation. However, they always end up finding calm and being guided by a serene trend that leads them to find authentic and real happiness.
Images courtesy of Amanda Cass and Pascal Campion
