Last update: 17 March, 2015
“Not being loved is just plain bad luck. The real misfortune is not knowing how to love ”. With this beautiful phrase, the French writer Albert Camus defined love.
These few words summarize the passion and defeat of when we love someone.
There are many people who ask themselves: why doesn't he love me? They verbalize in private what the heart hides. Disorientation and fear do the rest, confusing us and leaving a bad taste in our mouth.
How do we fall in love?
Love is not an exact science, it does not respond to clear concepts whose methods result in what we desire. Love is the greatest emotion we can feel for ourselves and for the people around us.
We invite you to look back and remember the beginning of your romantic relationships, they will surely have a common beginning: the inexplicable attraction with the person we love.
It can be a look, a laugh, shyness ... all these things are the essence of love and lead to a first loving approach, which over time can turn into a sentimental relationship.
My partner is perfect, I love my partner
If you hear someone say that their partner is perfect, not only will you feel incredulous, but you will also be able to say that the person making such a statement is in the dangerous phase of attraction. It is in this phase that we have the strongest feelings and the truest anger towards our partner. This period is characterized by an unstoppable desire to emphasize the positive aspects of our other half, downplaying their defects and tensions.
The idealization of the person we love fades little by little with the passage of time and with the overcoming of the attraction phase. Immaturity and the innate desire to be loved are emotions that fuel this attitude.
It is natural and no one escapes this torrent of feelings of joy and continuous happiness. The experience and knowledge of our emotions will calm these feelings in future episodes of attraction, transforming them into more serene, mature sensations, without however losing the illusion of being in love.
This idyllic setting will be short-lived. With the passage of time we will begin to see things as they are, to eliminate that golden patina that made us see everything perfect; this happens when the relationship with our partner stabilizes.
My partner has flaws, but I love him
It is then, when we realize that our partner is not perfect, when the filters that made us see everything wonderful and made us feel terribly attracted to our partner fade, that we realize that defects also exist, that 10 become 7 or 8, that the initial grade that we had attributed to our partner is lowered.
A phase of true knowledge beginsThe absence of the loved one, feelings of incompatibility, the feeling of not knowing each other emerge in the routine of couples: obviously this is not the end of a love, but the beginning of a job to be carried out personally.
