Last update: July 30, 2015
My mother used to say that love is never a waste, even when you are not paid as you deserve or want.
“Let it flow in streams” - he said. “Open your heart and don't be afraid they'll break it. Hearts that are too protected turn to stone ”.
“Heartbreak Cafe” – Penelope Stokes
Love is neither lost nor forgotten, it is kept in our heart. It is so, even if we don't think about it, even if we blindfold our eyes, even if that love no longer has a relevant place in our life and in our memory.
Love never stops making sense. However, sometimes, giving love and not being rewarded as we hope is frustrating and distressing.
It is undeniable that giving much to receive little is tiring. The trick is to expect nothing from anyone but ourselves. What has to happen will happen, but the "payment" for our actions and emotions will never be the same and balanced.
"Cultivate your ability to give without neglecting the ability to receive."
This principle contrasts strongly with the conception we have of love, which considers total and absolute abandonment to the other as an obvious gesture. It is difficult to understand, but it is essential to get rid of the idea of ​​love presented to us in the Walt Disney films, which can be summed up in "I do everything for you and, if you were to get away from me, nothing would make more sense".
There are couple relationships who continually risk collapsing precisely because of the total absence of reciprocity and gratitude. It's natural: the only way to keep love alive is by manifesting it every day.
However, It is good to be self-critical and ask ourselves if what we expect from our partner is something we do too. If so, we would be destroying the relationship and hurting ourselves totally free. Each person is made her way and gives love in a distinct way.
A breakup caused by emotional addiction represents an opportunity to try to eliminate certain of our needs and cultivate our inner self. Broken hearts are rebuilt and, in the future, they can give life to beautiful love stories between people they love without expecting anything in return.
Love is not lost, it is transformed
We are not talking about just any love, but love for oneself, a type of love that makes one look towards oneself and towards others with respect and affection. If you want love, give love, because giving it is the best way to receive it, and not only from others, but also from oneself.
It is essential to let our feelings free, to be able to feel good, capable of loving and being loved.
“What you sow you reap”.
In other words, opening our heart and letting our feelings free prevents us from turning into hard stones, which, as we know, do not feel and do not suffer, they do not feel either hot or cold. We, on the other hand, are not stones, but wandering hearts that feel and think.
It is evident that no one wants to live locked up; therefore, it is foolish to become our own jailers and oppress the feelings that would flow naturally.
“You can choose between being a happy and optimistic person and being a sad and negative person. No one is responsible for someone else's happiness, the decision is individual. "
Self-love is a trophy that we can win at any time
Loving yourself is the best way to have a lot to offer to others. You will see that if you have a partner, you will enjoy your relationship much more if you prefer to give rather than satisfy your needs.
It is a complicated thing, which can cause conflicts, especially at the beginning, since, normally, we conceive a love relationship as a relationship of emotional dependence. However, it is good to get rid of these preconceptions and create new thoughts about it: this will help us to revive or cultivate love, both our own and that of others.
"To love, one must undertake an inner work that is only possible thanks to solitude." Alejandro Jodorowsky
