Last update: June 01, 2016
They say that the way you live depends on where you focus your attention, so it is logical to think that it is much more advantageous to find a solution to what destabilizes us than to spend the day fighting windmills. Arguments are among the things that make us more unstable, and one way to get out of it is to act with the serenity of someone who smiles. and not with an impulsive and lasting anger.
When a situation gets out of hand and you feel you don't know where to start, patience, along with a hint of optimism, can help you overcome the circumstance immune. Otherwise, an unnecessary emotional imbalance could arise in you, resulting in stress, anxiety and anger.
Those who smile serenely always get what they want
Sometimes we find ourselves involved in a heated discussion; in most cases it usually happens with a family member or friend. This makes the tension even greater given that a disagreement that has gone wrong can lead to results we may regret.
Faced with such a circumstance, there are two possibilities: to lose control of the situation or to rationalize it as much as possible. The choice of one or the other depends on our strength to control impulsivity and to keep a cool head. In this sense, it is much healthier to have an open mind, because it can bring the conversation to a safe point.
"It's easier to get what you want with a smile than with the tip of the sword"
(William Shakespeare)
It is not a question of winning or losing; the lesson brought home by those who have been able to act serenely will be much more useful for the future: Peaceful dialogue, a smile at the right time and calm behavior in response to agitation will serve for other similar situations that you will have to face. For this reason, we tell you "smile serenely if you want to achieve something".
Getting angry takes you down a dead end street
Apart from some sporadic benefits, anger will lead you to a dead end: fury does not allow you to hear or be heard, just as it prevents understanding.
Arguments arise when the conversation suddenly changes its tone, then the voice rises and you can see nothing but your own ego. Neither of the two interlocutors pauses to think if maybe he is wrong, if he is trying to impose his ideas on him or if he has beliefs that may not correspond to reality.
"Clinging to anger is like grabbing a burning coal with the intention of throwing it at someone: in the end, you are the one who gets burned."
(Buddha)
Anger clouds the sensations and convinces the subject who experiences it that it is impossible for him to be wrong. Perhaps this person is not aware that winning the conflict will bring nothing to her, since she will not learn anything from the thoughts of her interlocutor and there will certainly be misunderstandings.
Handle a difficult situation calmly
The one who smiles in the face of complications will be stronger than the one who gets angry, above all because he will be able to better manage the difficult situations that he will face. He will know that reflection and analysis are the bitter enemies of the arrogant attitude that usually angers us.
He will also get the experience necessary to seek solutions to his problems and to open up to the tolerance necessary to have interpersonal relationships. It is important to know how to listen and respect what others think, even if it is a different idea from ours; it is also necessary to remember that we can all be wrong in words or in deeds.
It may seem obvious, but learning to control your nerves in delicate moments helps channel anger in moments when you can't hold it back. It's not about seeing problems with others as if they don't exist, but about learning how to manage them effectively.
"In moments of great stress or adversity, it is always better to keep busy to direct your anger and energy towards something positive"
(Lee Iacocca)
